Play 500 with Daffers

RobbieLad's Reply to Kate4

2012-02-01T13:00:00.000+04:00

Thank you Kate, Tibarn and Star. It is a great pleasure for me to be showing you ATF and trust you feel comfy playing it in future, so it is a two way streeet

Thanks Bryce

Gary

(member)

Ty Bryce for spending some time with me tonight, I feel a much better understanding for ATF now
Gary!

Kate4

(member)

Ty Bryce. I did enjoy learning how to play ATF & am very comfortable playing it. Having said that I am very much a traditionalist & enjoy playing 500 Classic which includes misere & open misere. Am very flexible & will play any form of 500 on this great site, but will not play any one form exclusively as I need to, in the immortal words of Monsieur Hercule Poirot, `use my little grey cells' in differing ways. The basic bidding system for ATF works equally well with other forms of this fabulous game 500.

So whatever bidding my partner(s) choose is fine with me just as long as I know.
Respect, flexibility & communication are key principles in card play and the `game of life!'

Have already met, played with & against some fun people &I look forward to meeting & playing with & against more of my fellow 500 devotees!

Thanks again, Bryce hope to play ATF with you again soon.

Star

(member)

I am feeling more confidant all the time thankyou so much Bryce.

RobbieLad

(member)

"The basic bidding system for ATF works equally well with other forms of this fabulous game 500"

WHAH???? Calling aces at 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11???? Ye gods! Don't try it in a regular CC game or there'll be steam coming out of your p's ears very quickly, while the opposition rub their hands with glee and you plummet down the rankings!

I find the bidding in ATF+ to be even more reckless, although you should probably speak to Fe and The 4th about that as they're the experts on that particular form of the game. I don't think the ATF+ button shows up unless you've got Platinum Membership, unless it's changed recently. That in itself is worth paying the extra for though, in my opinion, as there are many other benefits besides access to ATF+ and automatic Elite status.

Kate4

(member)

Robbie, You misunderstood. The operative word was `basic'. Meaning calling aces at the 6 level. Calling the `bird' at 6NT which has been standard for 500 since Adam was a Lad. I also said I was a` traditionalist.’ This means I prefer 500 as played & loved it for all my life where only the `bird' is called.

You have my complete agreement when you say that the ATF bidding system is `reckless’. Bidding aces beyond the 6 level only serves to give the opposition more information than is necessary. To be completely frank, bidding aces at the 6 level also does this & can lead to problems with next call if the opposition passes. My preference is to only call an ace at 6 level if there is also strength in the suit.

ATF is a `bidding system or convention only’ for the game 500. It’s the name of a card game. Shouldn’t be confused as such. Same as `ACOL’ is a universal bidding system for the game of Bridge. In Bridge however as the bidding starts at level 1, indicating 6 tricks, there’s a lot more `bidding space’. More info can be exchanged between partners re the shape of the hand & cards held. Therefore it’s of `real’ benefit to call suits, aces & kings at various levels. This `bidding space’ is not available in 500. Therefore the less the opposition know the better.

My maxim for most things & this includes the many card games I play is KISS – Keep It Simple, Stupid.

I meant what I said. This little black duck is flexible & will adjust `within reason’. That means if a partner prefers, I will call aces at the 6 level, the bird as 6NT, prefer `bird’ call over ace call & strength at the 7 level. Also I understand that if my partner calls 7spade they are looking for misère & 9spade open misère. This appears to be the most used bidding system on this site.

Also, out of respect for other players, if I join a table advertised as classic 500, Turbo 500, club classic 500, ATF or Custom, I will play that particular form of the game. I will not ask that they play as I like. As far as I'm ’concerned if any player doesn’t want to play that particular form of the game or use the `bidding system’ accepted as being usual for that room, either don’t join in or play the game as is.

I’ve already encounted hostility regarding my preference to play non-ATF. As a result will have made it to some players `will not play’ list. So be it.

Robbie, with regard to `platinum member’ Not sure if that was `tongue-in-cheek’. Me, I’m just a member. Why? This is the only 500 site I’ve found. If my paying membership keeps it `alive & kicking’ great. Rankings never bother me they’re subjective only. My self-esteem doesn’t revolve around them but they do provide an added interest.

I’ve been fortunate already to have met some like-minded people on this site & have enjoyed many good games, both in the Members only Rooms & the Public rooms.

Robbie, hope we get to play with or against each other, think it might be fun. That’s why I play!

Steve2

(member)

Kate i competely agree
i think
hmm
ok agree with some
not all
uh
never mind

Kate4

(member)

Steve2, you're obviously a decisive gentleman...perhaps....maybe....unsure...we'll see.....yes? no?

Anyone who can make me laugh is ok in my book.

RobbieLad

(member)

Hi Kate. I think you might find my entire post was "tongue-in-cheek"! :) Anyway, welcome aboard and I look forward to a game very soon.

I rarely play ATF, being pretty much strictly CC, but each to their own. Anyway, for the benefit of yourself and any other new members, herewith some lowdown on a few site conventions which I hope you'll find helpful. As a general rule (which doesn't apply to all players, and no doubt others will also have stuff to contribute), you'll find the following conventions on the members' side of the site (for once I'm being serious):

With the exception of ATF, which is a version perfected by member Bryce, the vast majority of elo games in members, easily 95%-plus, are Club Classic format. The "Classic 500" option is not used by most members because of where Open sits in the bidding table. You might see the odd game of Turbo but very rarely. Custom is sometimes played in non-elo games, where a single player has started solo, or with 2-player, but rarely as a 4-player elo game, and 6-handed games are pretty much never played except when all the participants are a lot drunker than normal.

The following applies to CC calling:

Most players new to members, myself included, arrive having only ever called the joker at 6 for years, but soon adapt to calling aces once they see the benefit. You will always get the odd individual who steadfastly refuses to adopt the convention at first, but until they eventually see the light, they'll often struggle for decent games as most better players will tend to avoid partnering them. In non-members, calling aces at 6 is less common of course. With the exception of a few decent regular players in nons, that's one of the reasons why the average standard of play in non-members is that much lower.

While a small minority of top players - e.g. The 4th and, erm, I'll get back to you on the other names :) - call bird after aces, the majority of regular players tend to call bird first followed by aces in order, at 6. There's also a bit of a weird virus indigenous to New Zealand which used to cause certain inhabitants there to call bird after black aces but before red, or some such. I believe the World Health Organisation have been taking steps to stamp that out and have quarantined most carriers to Stewart Island, but there are still very occasional outbreaks on the North Island. I'm guilty myself of that at times, where if I have first bid with both bird and ace of spades, and a very strong hand which I expect to win the bidding, I'll call the ace first to see what everyone else has got, but that's an exception and we all have our foibles, some more than others.

Depending on other calls, it's sometimes pertinent to call the bird at 7 also, but generally not aces. The exception to that is in NT bidding, where, as long as you and your partner are on the same wavelength, you can get up to all sorts of mischief calling aces, kings and even queens right up to 10, and you'll no doubt come across that in due course. When it works it works well and when it fails it fails spectacularly. As a general rule though, I'd forget everything you've been taught about bidding aces at 7 and 8 in ATF, when playing CC.

Be very careful with interpretation of 7 spades calls, as it doesn't necessarily mean that your p wants Misere. It can be a call-off by your p if you've called an ace or bird and they have nothing, or it could mean your p actually wants 7 spades. The only way to know (or nearly know) is by getting to know your p's game. There's a thread in forum called "Who calls 7 spades for Misere?", but even half of that is a pack of lies, I've found in practice. Some players will jump to an 8 spades strength call to avoid confusion, which is good as long as you can make 8 tricks of course.

You're quite correct that 9 spades straight up means you want Open. Many players will "make their own way" to Misere without flagging it up so-obviously by using 7 spades. This may involve lying about aces and, less commonly, the bird. Some on site (e.g. Wayne) consider calling 6NT without joker to be a hanging offence. Others have been known to do it with gay abandon as a stepping stone to Misere. While it would be impertinent to name and shame any individuals, one such culprit, and a regular #1 to boot tut tut, has got a two-letter name beginning with "F". (And I used to do it myself, to be fair, until Wayne told me off.)

Under normal circúmstances, I consider my p's failure to call an ace (or worse still, bird), whether they're strong in that suit or not, to be a cardinal sin worthy of expulsion from the site and being forced to do six months community service playing Snap with 3-year-olds. I had a game recently where my p (one of my favourite and regular p's in fact, which threw me all the more), opened up with a jump bid of 8 diamonds or hearts, not declaring that they had the bird. The opposition went Open. I had a nailed-on game-winning 10 spades hand had I known where the bird was, but had to pass. In the end it cost us the game.

Obviously there are exceptions to not calling aces etc, but in my opinion, hiding such information from your partner will cost you more games than win you them, in addition to not doing much for your popularity as a potential p and gaining you a reputation as something of a dodgy bidder, for those who make a habit of it. However, once your p has passed, bid how and what you want.

While it's less common, some will call their strongest ace, in preference to a weaker lower ace, given a choice; Lil2 will use this method at times, for example, another very good player, so "lowest ace first" is not 100% across the site.

Close to the back door, many players call strength at 6 rather than aces. How close depends on the player. Abba, for example, one of the site's best, states clearly on her profile that she calls strength below -250, while some equally-good players will still call bird and aces conventionally even at -490. Ergo, there's no site consensus on this, but it's something to be aware of.

I wouldn't worry about not calling aces for fear of getting left on a 6 call, because it's convention with most players to call you off, using 7 spades if they have nothing better. Notable exceptions are Gollum, who hates using call-offs (he's another top player so that's his prerogative), or where a 7 call would set the opposition up for a game-winning Misere bid. As always, "the scores dictate the bidding". But in general, while it's sometimes best to get left on 6, it's more commonly a right pain in the ar$e when you've got a cracking and/or potentially game-winning hand, in my humble opinion.

Hope this hasn't confused you too much, and always remember, it's okay to lie sometimes. And automatons rarely make it to #1; ask Huey, Luey and Duey.

As there are many players better and more experienced than myself on the site, you may well find others who will disagree with some or all of what I've put, but anyway, that's how I see it.

Somebody has obviously stolen Steve's password, if you thought the person you were talking to was a gentlemen. It was probably Toby you were conversing with, in fact.

Bit of a long post, I've just noticed. Bryce, what's the name of your publisher?

Good luck!

RobbieLad's description of a "finesse"

2011-05-28T06:40:00.003+04:00

1. Your partner leads low,

2. Next player goes lowish or offsuit,

3. You have both the ace and the queen, and play the queen.

You stand a 2/3 chance (more or less) of winning the trick with the queen, hence keeping the ace for a further trick.

Daffer's Addendum: Finesses work MUCH better with uncalled aces.

Another scenario:

1. You have both the ace (uncalled) and the queen, and you have the lead play the queen.

2. If your opponent in the second seat has the king s/he may hold back from playing it in hope that their partner has it or in fear that the other opponent has it.

Toby's Top 16 Tips

2011-05-28T06:31:00.006+04:00

A rarity worth preserving - a sensible, coherent post from the dawg!

1. Make friends with the pass button (a dafferism).

2. Score dictates bidding.

3. Fortune favours the brave.

4. Generally play out trumps if your side has the bid.

5. Generally never lead trumps back at opposition who won the bid.

6. Third plays high (ie 2nd often can play low/finesse).

7. Fourth plays to win the trick.

8. Never (rarely) leave partner on an ace call - if nothing else call 7spds.

9. 9 spds for open - call ur lowest suit or 9NT to signal bird/high.

10. Be careful when finessing.

11. When in opposition and trumps are still in play, first discard is generally to short yourself in the hope that your partner wins the trick and leads back.

12. Don't lead the joker first trick when you have won a NT bid.

13. If your partner has an Ace, and you have a low and the king, risk leading the king first and then lead to your partners ace and hope he has a few more tricks up his sleeve.

14. Never lose an unforced misere.

15. Dont call 8 if u cant defend open.

16. At the beginning of the game, try to not be first to go negative unnecessarily.

Suggestion Box

2011-05-28T06:17:00.003+04:00

If you have any posts on the great game feel free to post them as comments to this topic and I'll consider them for publication.

Lee's No Trumps Play/Bidding

2011-05-28T06:05:00.002+04:00

by Lee

How often have you seen two players with a good no trumps hand bouncing back and forward in the bidding without telling each other anything about their hands? E.g. one bids 6nt, the other bids 7nt, the next call is 8nt, ect.

How often have you had a good no trumps hand that was only missing a couple of key cards that could have allowed you to call slam? If only your partner was able to call you those cards, if they had them?
What is the highest point scoring bid in 500? No trumps, of course.

Most players follow conventions when bidding a suit bid. There are even basic calling conventions for misere and open misere play. Yet they follow no bidding rules when calling a no trumps hand – why is this? It is, after all, a unique form of play in 500. As unique as any of the other types of calls available.

All of the above are good reasons why some simple rules of bidding should be followed when calling a no trumps hand. Like any form of play in 500, the idea is to share as much information about your hand with your partner so as to maximize your bid.

First Golden Rule – When does a no trumps bid begin?
Please note there are no set rules, as two partners may settle on their own signs for when the “trigger” for a no trumps bid begins. However the easiest way when getting used to no trumps bidding is that a secondary call of no trumps between two partners starts a no trumps bid.

Example:
P1: 6nt
P2 7D
P3 7nt
P4 pass

Player 3, (P1’s partner) has made a secondary call of no trumps. He/She is announcing that they have a good no trumps hand and want to definitely head in that direction in the bid.

Further examples:
P1: 6C
P2 7H
P3 7nt
P4 pass
P1 8nt
Player 1, (P3’s partner) has just made a secondary call of no trumps.

Second Golden Rule – What do I start bidding?

When a secondary call of no trumps is made, partners should start bidding their aces, lowest suit first.
Bear in mind there is no need to call aces that may have already been called at the 6 level – your partner is already aware of them and it is not advancing the no trumps bid.

Simple Example:
P1: 6nt
P2 7D
P3 7nt
P4 pass
P1 8S (I’ve got the ace of spades)
P2 Pass
P3 8nt
P1 Pass (I’ve called all my aces)

In the above example, P1 has pushed the bid up by one trick by calling the ace of spades, but why shouldn’t they when they are calling a certain trick?

Imagine if P3 has an excellent run in certain suits and was only missing the ace of spades to call 10nt – He/she wouldn’t have let the bid rest at 8nt and most certainly would have bid slam.

Note that both partners have an opportunity to bid their aces and should do so.

Example:
P1: 6nt
P2 7S
P3 7nt
P4 pass
P1 8S (I’ve got the ace of spades)
P2 Pass
P3 8D (I’ve got the ace of diamonds)
P1 8H (I’ve got the ace of hearts)
P3 8nt (No more aces to bid)
P1 9C (Guess what – I’ve got the ace of clubs too)
P3 9nt

In the above example, neither partner should be left in any doubt as to what a safe lead is. Both should also be in an excellent position to work out whether a 10nt bid is possible.

Note that P1 has pushed the bid up 2 tricks (to 9nt) by calling two aces – but again, if his/her partner’s 7nt bid was realistic, then this is no problem as P1 has simply called two more certain tricks.

P1 has also made any Kings/Queens held by P3 in these suits look particularly good as well.

Third Golden Rule – NO ONE GETS LEFT ON AN ACE BID!!!!!

In all of the above examples, once the no trumps bid has commenced both partners call all aces they have but NEVER pass when an ace is called to them.

This is a simple but vital rule – once you’ve exhausted all your bids, you NEVER pass, you call no trumps. Your partner may continue to call their hand after this – always respond with a no trumps bid, NEVER pass.

Fourth Golden Rule – Don’t up the bid by one if you’re calling a card that’s already been called

If you’ve already called an ace before the no trumps bid commenced, don’t call it again if it is going to lift the bid by one. Your partner may have already taken this card into account when calling 7nt or above to trigger the no trumps bid.

There’s no problem in calling it again if it isn’t going to lift the bid by one though.

Calling a run

What if you have the ace/king (or more) in a suit and you want to call it?
In a no trumps bid, if these cards haven’t already been called, you are calling two more certain tricks, so call it!

Example
P1: 6nt
P2 pass
P3 7nt
P4 pass
P1 9D (I’ve got the Ace and King of diamonds)
P3 9nt

Note that if P3 had the ace of hearts, there would have been an opportunity to call it also.

What if P1 held the Ace, King, Queen, Jack and a few more smaller diamonds?

Between two players who understand these simple bids and follow the basic rules, there should be no reason why P1 wouldn’t call 10D, and P3 should respond with an ace of hearts bid (10H) or 10nt.

If P3 responded with 10H, P1 must call 10nt. But note the ease of play because of a few simple calls. P1 plays out his/her diamond run then is left in no doubt what to lead – a heart.

(a further post from Lee on this topic)
"Most players follow conventions when bidding a suit bid. There are even basic calling conventions for misere and open misere play. Yet they follow no bidding rules when calling a no trumps hand – why is this? It is, after all, a unique form of play in 500. As unique as any of the other types of calls available."

Grumma and I had a good understanding (we did have our occasional disasters). Take the following example:

Grumma: 6S
Lee: 6NT
Grumma: 7NT
Lee: 8S
Grumma 8NT
Lee: Pass

Grumma knew I wouldn't have been calling a suit bid (a definate NO NO when your partner annouces to you they want a NT bid). She knew I wouldn't advance the bid by one unless I was calling a further winner. She knew I was calling the King of Spades.

We got the bid in a cakewalk, which was pretty typical for our NT play.

To me it was a very simple and risk free bid. I daresay though, the prospect of calling a mere King at 8 would make most players baulk. I don't know why. In NT Kings are of the same standing as bauers in a suit bid. A lot of players think nothing of calling a bauer at 8.

IMPORTANT: Anyone who wants to follow these basic NT bidding conventions, please tell me before we partner/play. If you haven't, I won't know and will interpret your calls in the othodox way. Disaster is likely to ensue.

Craig's Pizza Oven

2011-01-26T01:01:00.003+04:00

This man has his priorities just right!

Stoppers

2011-01-26T00:20:00.006+04:00

Stopper (plug), also known as a cork, a plug or a bung (Wikipedia)

The other night my partner and I were leading a game 320 points vs the opponents -480. My partner started the bidding by passing and the opp on my right called 6 spades. I didn't have the bird so called 6NT - what I call a "stopper" bid.

The opp on my left sensibly passed fearing a game-winning misere and so did the other opp. I didn't get my 6NT and the opp on my right said BL!

It seemed a strange comment as I had achieved my objective of stopping the opps calling the bird and easily winning a 7 or 8 call moving them safely away from the backdoor. I explained the rationale for my 6NT call to be told it was "BS" by my aggrieved opp. Ah well, 'twas water of this duck's back and the opps proved my point by backdooring themselves next hand - LOL.

"Stoppers" are a valuable bidding strategy worth adding to any player's bidding arsenal.

Lee's Bidding Basics

2011-01-25T16:07:00.004+04:00

I'd ask some of the newer players to just consider the following issues and yes, I'm trying to brief...

BIDDING ACES AT SIX

In any 7 or 8 call (your strength) you are going to take, on average, around 4/5 tricks with your trumps (all things going well). This means you will need to take at least 2/3 in "offsuit" tricks.

If you have no idea what offsuit aces your partner holds, or you don't communicate your aces to your partner, significant disavantages will result. You will have little, if any, idea of what to keep or throw out if you get the bid and kitty ("shortsuiting"). We've all seen how Huey, Luey and Duey keep one of every suit to lead in offsuit and how disasterous it is. Often you'll also find you've underbidded a good hand through being completely in the dark as to how many tricks you might have - taking both your hand and your partners hand into account.

It's for these reasons the orthodox style of play is to bid your aces at 6, before calling your strength.

What holds some players back is the fear that "I'll get left on it". The accepted convention (certainly on this site) is that no one gets left on their six call. If you don't have a viable 7 bid, call your partner off their 6 bid with 7 Spades. Expect the same of your partner.

If you get left on 7 Spades, don't fret. It may be the 7 call that your partner wanted. Even if it turns pear shaped, remember 140 points is only 20 - 100 points more than a 6 bid and its a small price to pay as insurance against losing a good 7 or 8 bid.

BIDDING STRENGTH

Just some small advice - be realistic, unless you're forced by the scoreboard to do otherwise. In a Red suit bid there's 13 trumps, in Black there's 12. Think about how many you have, how strong they are and how many you're likely to have left after you've bled all of the trumps out of the opposing players.

If you have a bauer and three rags - the math and probability is totally against you. The probable scenario is "murderation". It often takes up to 4 or 5 leads to get the trumps out and you aren't going to win them all anyway. Even worse, an Ace with a few rags just plainly isn't a strength bid (unless you're forced to do so by the scoreboard).

Bidding strength in an unforced situation on the hope that you'll pick up two or three high trumps in the kitty is just plainly silly. The likely scenario is murderation.

CALLING THE JOKER

Always call the joker at 6. Always. It's a very important card in a suit bid and the ultimate card in a no trumps bid. It's the key.

Again, what holds some players back is the fear that "I'll get left on 6NT". The accepted convention (certainly on this site) is that no one gets left on a 6NT bid. If you don't have a viable 7 bid, call your partner off their 6NT bid with 7 Spades. Expect the same of your partner.

Again, if you get left on 7 Spades, don't fret. It may be the 7 call that your partner wanted. Even if it turns pear shaped, remember 140 points is only 20 points more than a 6NT bid and its a small price to pay as insurance against losing a good 7 or 8 bid.

AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, BLEED ALL TRUMPS BEFORE PLAYING OFFSUIT

Try to get as many of your opponents' trumps off them before leading your offsuit. If you have the high trump cards, keep playing them until the opposition have no more trumps. Don't keep leading them if you're only taking trumps off your partner - you're eliminating them from possibly taking a cheap trick or two by trumping the opposition's good offsuit.

Nothing is sillier than seeing a good offsuit ace that is definately worth a trick getting trumped by the opposition.

WORK CO-OPERATIVELY WITH YOUR PARTNER, NOT AGAINST THEM

Co-operative play starts with the bidding. It's easier to win a 500 bid playing with 20 cards as opposed to 10. Approach the bidding from the footing that your objective is to share as much information about your hand with your partner as you can. You have a better chance of winning and also getting maximum value for your bid.

Conflicting bids - think carefully about overbidding your partners red call with a black one, or vice versa. There is an old maxim - those who overbid, must get.

Always call into your partner's hand rather than against it - this is the situation where one player wants (for instance) 7D and their partner wants 7H. Yeah, sure, you have this real pretty hearts hand. So what. The game is about taking a bid, not which one of the partners gets the kitty. Think carefully about whether your pretty hearts might be more useful as offsuit tricks and whether a better bid is 8D instead of 7H.

Also, discussing bidding styles with your partner prior to a bid is much better than discussing it as a post mortem of "what went wrong". If you are a fan of the 7S for misere or 9S for open bids, tell your partner up front if you're not sure they know.

Be open to polite suggestions of how you might improve your play. Don't be needlessly argumentative or defensive. I've certainly learnt heaps off the permanent (and not so permanent) fixtures on the site.

I recommend in the strongest terms that newer players read the information at:

play500.blogspot.com/2008/05/my-500-top-10.html

With the qualification that some of this player's tips (like "avoid 7S for misere calls") are probably fairly described as personal preferences that you can eventually make your own mind up about.

Calling 7 Spades for Misere

2011-01-25T15:42:00.007+04:00

A lively conversation between Lee & Toby worth saving from Richard's auto-delete:

http://www.play500online.com/500/forum.jsp?Forum=Forum&ID=3360 - do they get paid by the word?

Lee:

No. [Calling 7 spades for miser] creates untold confusion when you have a genuine spades hand.

Gabriella:

in that instance l would call 8spades straight up to prevent any confusion

Court:
Agree with gabs

Lee:
That creates as many problems as it solves. Firstly, what if you have a viable 7 hand but not really a viable 8 hand? You're overbidding merely to accomodate a "tricky" 7S call for misere. Secondly, depending on the state of play, we are often quite reluctant to go to an 8 bid before you know whether your opponent/s are looking for an open bid. Going straight to 8S can hand them a gold brick.

Finally, the "straight to 8S to avoid confusion" is a tactic that Huey, Luey and Duey adopt after a 6NT bid - I'm asking (tongue in cheek) are we as skilful, imaginative and creative as the bots.....on second thoughts, don't answer that.

I dislike the 7S for misere call because it tells me NOTHING about my partners hand. When you're down and defending, blocking etc., or even when you're looking for a potential game winning bid, the presence of one bower, even a king or queen in offsuit can be all important. My own view is that I will give a bid, even if its a weak one, before resorting to the negative (and I don't mean that in a pejorative sense) forms of play like misere and open.

With all respect to the misere/open players, I've seen it dominate some players complete outlook on playing 500 - to the point where a 7S call seems to be the two out of every three bids, followed by the inevitable misere/open call. It seems to me that the thinking becomes infected along these lines: I've got a poor hand, I just can't bring myself to hit that pass button, I know, I'll call misere.

I see so many poor misere calls going down that seem to be driven by this kind of outlook. Amongst skilled and experienced players, miseres and opens often go down.. On the odd occasion I've enjoyed the reaction of the misere/open junkie who retorts "I was unlucky".

A favourite partner of mine (Gollum) and I once adopted a deliberate strategy when playing known misere/open junkies. When the 7S or 9S call was given, we would call misere or open just to deprive the misere/open junkie of their "fix". It was illuminating to watch the frustration levels on these players ratchet up to punching the computer screen levels. Any other player on this site who wants to adopt a similar tactic when partnering me should let me know.

Toby:

Net still down so I'll come 2 the defense of 7sps as the site isn't iPhone compatible.

A 7spds bid is a highly useful bit of information and disinformation. It is a bid. That says enough. In a tight spot (Lee has none left) a 7spds bid let's ur partner know that you'll take the bid to open, just call them off and keep in the bidding. The most effective countervailing force to a strong hand is a genuine weak hand. someone has to stay in it so it also is a marker that you are generally weak (which you all know that, along with craven, I mam). 2 bits of information. My partner can overbid my call but then knows the risks. Another team can steal it to miser but if my ps stayed in, the ops better have the bollocks to call open. 9/10 times I'll take down a dodgy open so that bluff is just that.

In terms of disinformation, the 7spds call is the penultimate, after 9spds. So many times ive called 7spds, ops stolen to mis and left me on an 8 bid I wanted, often leading to front door.

It also blocks your opponents positive play if you want a positive 8, 9 or 10 bid.

I think this debate is too narrow: we use 'gb' or 'bl' too freely. If there are people with retarded limbic systems who can't regulate their impulse control and must steal the kit and lose repeatedly unforced, then I suggest new 'discourtesous' and 'impolite' consolances such as 'bb', 'ss' or 'kw' :)

Yes games can seem 'spoilt' by misereres or kitty trollopes but that's the hand ur dealt and new tactics, such as homegirl#2 and dafts, are needed.

Lee:
O defender of the 7 Spades faithful….

At least you have a rationale. I doubt if many others have thought it through like this. I’ll say at the outset there are certain advantages attaching to the 7 Spades for misere bidders, I’ve always held the view that the advantages are outweighed by the disadvantages.

I don’t accept that the 7 Spades for misere has some special aura about it that produces significant tactical or bluffing advantages. It has no more or less tactical advantages than any other well thought out bid. I can think of just a few in a short space of time…if my partner has passed and I have nothing, I’ll call the bird just to throw doubt into the oppositions mind. If I’m left on it it’s a cheap block. If I truly want a red bid, bid black to thwart the oppositon’s bid and if they overcall you, then you are set for your preferred bid. Misere may be an option through all these permutations. These are all alternative ways of getting to ends that are said to be the advantages of calling 7 Spades for misere.

On balance, the things that sway me are:

- there are alternative ways of getting to misere without calling 7 Spades

- 7 spades for misere eliminates one bid of a positive nature due to the confusion it creates

- A well thought out bid can create just as much confusion and disinformation as 7 Spades for misere

- I’ve seen so many slam hands that were only missing a high (and uncalled) bower or even a King in offsuit. Slam downs open…shouldn’t the first objective be to see if its “on”?

- By lying doggo on whether you want misere or not, you hold the element of surprise and often prevent your bid being stolen and also have the option of passing if you can take down a stolen misere/open bid by the opposition.

I think players should stay flexible with their bidding to deal with the exigencies of the scoreboard and cards in play in a particular hand. I’ve used the 7 Spades for misere bid where I have a hand like Toby’s personal life…..that is a solitary Queen surrounded by companions, none of which is over 10. I just don’t use it as some kind of panacea in response to a difficult bidding situation.

It’s good to have the debate..players can make their own minds up what they prefer. Just tell me if you call 7 Spades for misere because even though I don’t like it, I’ll always call a partner who uses it off 7 Spades.

Just remember though, I’ve always believed that those who fail in getting unforced miseres should be pelted mercilessly with urine trough soap blocks, then flogged over the head into delirium with big rubber 14 inch sex toys.

The 4th:
Listening to you two bounce off each other is a treat.

Like Derek and Clive / Mandrake and Worf / Roy and H.G. Nelson / Fangs and Cass

Great to see this winning combination back in action.

Lee:
"I remember a game this past week where Lee's partner tried to sneak to misere through bluff bidding. I stole the misere, Lee called 8 following his p's bid and was sunk out the back door. This fundamental and systematic failing of dodgy or false 6/7 bids WILL be mercilessly exploited by your opposition."

Tobes, this has everything to do with the seating of the players and nothing to do with the 7S for misere debate. Are you saying that if my p had of called 7S for misere that you wouldn't have stolen the misere bid anyway???? I don't see how this isolated event (you don't tell us what the scoreline was) advances the case- at best its a neutral situation.

With all respect, I'm not inclined to support my view by reference to an isolated game "last week" that might support my position. If you were going to be fair and objective about it, I suspect you'd need to do a qualitative analysis of the two differing styles over maybe 1000 games. Supporting your argument with the isolated events of last week is really like John Maynard Keynes advancing his general theory of money and inflation by reference to the price of asparagus at Coles "last week".

"Sneaking to misere and open through false or black flag calls is a recipe for disaster which totally negates any benefit. Though with some players I have to sneak, there runs always the risk of someone else snatching it, unless I actually have the ace on 6 or the bird I actually call."

How is it any different to the flashing neon sign that the 7S for misere call is? Can you elaborate on how that style prevents the risk of the misere bid being stolen? I'd of thought it actually enhances that risk.

The risk of the bid being stolen is completely equal no matter what style is used, my preference is to not take out a full page ad that I want misere by calling 7S. My view is that it reduces the risk of the bid being stolen, the degree of which I accept is open to debate.

Let's face it Tobes, there are situations a plenty where a misere bid will be pinched whether you like it or not. I've found through experience its the standard bluff bid for any team on 250 plus points.

Again Tobes, at the very best this is a neutral point.

"there are alternative ways of getting to misere without calling 7 Spades: fatally flawed. often the false call is either in the suit or the opposite that undoes the misere bid."

I never advocated "false calls" as the norm, I said call your hand first, even if it is weak. You have to be unlucky not to have an Ace or a bauer with a few rags to call. When you are that unlucky, even I will consider a range or responses...a black flag bid, a steal bid or even the 7S for misere bid. And always the maxim "bid to the scoreboard" applies, I'm not saying give a weak bid if you don't need to.

It's true that where you might be calling a weak hand, the best cards of the bid will, theoretically, be distributed through three other hands, two of which are against you. The odds are against you. But as 500 is a game of chance, there is the prospect of your partner utilising your meagre offerings, even if its in the alternative colour to your call, that is they might call 8H in response to your weak 7D. They might hope for some support in offsuit D's as well, even if its a King or Queen.

"7 spades for misere eliminates one bid of a positive nature due to the confusion it creates: when balanced through the frequency of misere to genuine 7(only) spds the benefits for having a '7spds = call me off' with '7spds = 140points' is significantly greater"

Yes you get 140 points for a genuine 7S. But its a 100 more for each bid above it Tobes as we all know. When you point it out like that, its forces me to reconsider my views. I'd go as far as to say bogus 7S calls for misere calls do significant damage to calls in an entire suit due to the confusion. Seen many a player cussing because they didn't really know whether their potential 8, 9 or even 10S bid to block or defeat open, or win the game, was really on.

The "frequency of misere" also needs to be qualified. I take it what you're referring to there is the frequency of misere bids, as opposed the frequency of successful misere bids, which is a completely different thing. You'd need to demonstrate (again, possibly over a reasonable sample, say 1000 games) that the frequency of successful misere bids outweighs the losses. I can only speculate on my impressions and experience, without any hard statistics. That impression is that amongst experienced players, unforced miseres and opens go down slightly more often than what they get up.

"A well thought out bid can create just as much confusion and disinformation as 7 Spades for misere: true - if you know YOU will take the bid, be it mis, and 8/9 call or open, then create as much disinformation as you want. Creating confusion through false 6 bids which undermines your partners confidence in you and your bidding is not worth it."

Again Tobes, you're taking small part of the argument and trying to elevate it to being the core principle to suit your response. I never said that false 6 bids are the norm, or the tricky way to get to misere. You have to be unlucky not to have a genuine ace or even weak strength bid. If you haven't got an orthodox bid and you want misere, it's those isolated situations where you may need to be crafty, always remembering that the scoreboard dictates the bidding. My style of play (love it, hate it, rip it to pieces if you will) is that if I've got a decent low run hand, I'd prefer to call 9S for open than give a misleading false bid for misere. So the (rare, I would argue) occasions where a false or misleading bid would be used by me to get to misere would be:

1. No possible orthodox call on my hand.
2. Might get misere, not confident of open.
3. Scoreboard dictates that I bid.

Rarely found myself in this situation. But even so, I've called say for instance 6D on the king of diamonds. Yes it can confuse my p, but its equally a giggle when the opposition bid winner short suits against this bogus Ace call only to finf their p has it. Disinformation cuts both ways.

"I’ve seen so many slam hands that were only missing a high (and uncalled) bower or even a King in offsuit. Slam downs open…shouldn’t the first objective be to see if its “on”?: out of the wash, I've seen very few slam hands assisted by open communication of a bauer or a king through this method, and many more lose through it. If you have a 7+ or 8+ hand and you need to block through a slam bid, bid it and let luck direct the bid. Misleading bids (ie. weak 7 suit bid leading to 8/9/10 bid that loses) is too common."

Scoreboard dictates the bidding. Never said always call a weak hand. If you've called a weak hand in the hope of getting misere when you really didn't need to, then your playing poorly and nothing in this debate will help you. If you have a genuine low run hand and no orthodox bid to give, and the scoreboard doesn't dictate that you should bid, then on balance you're better off calling 9S for open for the reasons I've given above (if the open was truly on).

If the scoreboard doesn't dictate you bid and you think you have misere but not open and no othodox bid to give, maybe you should reconsider the strength of your misere bid - if its got some gaps its more probable than not that experienced players are going to take it down. Make friends with the pass button.

The situations where I'd call a weak hand in preference to 7S for misere are:

1. Scoreboard dictates that I bid
2. Scoreboard means that the ultimate bid will be 9, open or 10. One team will be forced into a block of some kind.
3. I have a possible scatchy misere.

In those situations, you can't discount the possibity of actually getting a misere bid in, which should suggest to your p "dont rely to heavily on prior bids" as much as the 7S for misere bids does.

"By lying doggo on whether you want misere or not, you hold the element of surprise and often prevent your bid being stolen and also have the option of passing if you can take down a stolen misere/open bid by the opposition: see afore retorts."

Nothing in the "afore retorts" really makes a dent on this proposition. You always hold an element of surprise by not taking out the full page ad that 7S for misere is, though I accept the degree of surprise is something that can be debated.

"Dodgy false 6 bids and weak 7 bids will work every now and again, but will be mercilessly exploited by experienced and/or ruthless oppositions. 1-2/10 times it might work, but on the big plays will let you down more often than not. Most significantly, it does undermine confidence and sews the seeds of doubt between you and your partner."

If the scoreboard dictates that I bid and it turns pear shaped, my hope is that my partner understands that I would would prefer to give a weak bid than no bid, or a bid that tells them nothing about my hand. If I constantly give unforced weak calls on the hope of calling misere, then my partner is not only entitled to lose confidence in me, they're entitled to refuse to play with me.

In an unforced situation, if you think you might have a scratchy misere but not open, and no orthodox call to give, think about making friends with the pass button. If your misere doesn't have the same prospects in open, think carefully about - the weakness in it is likely to be exploited by good players just as easily as if it were an open.

We are consensus ad idem about one thing Tobes. I don't think any of us (including me) will be assisted in improving play by automaton responses like "blp". Polite discussion amongst players about what went wrong should be possible. As for "ss", well you know it won't ruffle me but some of the more sensitive flowers might get in a flap LOL.

Btw 4th I disagree. Its more like watching Mr Fawlty and Manuel...after all, Tobes is from Barcelona

Toby:
Stealing: Not saying either is steal proof. However, with 7spds bid, your partner knows you have a weak hand and that will inform their bid – if stolen and in a tight spot or a position of strength, your partner can make an informed decision to either leave, or push an open if you would prefer to see the opponents hand to take them down. The risk of stealing may be equal, but once stolen your position is stronger as you know the basic pattern of card distribution. 7spds informs, bluff deceives.

Call your hand: Calling your hand first, even if weak, is the undoing of many misere bids. This informs the opposition twice over to your vulnerabilities.

Bidding is communication – in the end it’s going to come down to your own inclinations. I’d hazard (no, no quantification has be undertaken) that the yes no split by members is around 1:1. With experienced members it’s probably 1:2. Peeps who don’t will continue to do so and those who do will.

I ‘believe’ that as a call, 7spd call meaning ‘don’t leave me on it’ is much more useful than a call your hand bid or a fluffy bluff. Though I see merit both, as a 7spder, I’m lucky that I can break the rule and not use 7spds.

Face it you walking public health threat, deep down in your incontinence product you know 7spds is a superior strategy with much inbuilt flexibility and crucially, clarity.
________

Lee, just read what you wrote in it's entirety. A few points: how many players on the site call with your level of sophistication? Def less than 20, prob less than 10 well. Given the a) range of partners with their ai) range of experience and aii) range of skill; diversity of calling (don't call aces, don't call bird, don't call aces or bird, don't call misere open etc) and b) due to accepted rotations peeps don't get a great chance at refining bidding with individual players with their individual strengths and accompained heuristics. As a default the clarity of 7spds is possibly more universal than not.

I'd suggest your beef is less with 7spds and more generally about standard of bidding. I'd be the first to admit the names of c) players and d) player combos who are superior generally in their e) calling and f) play. This is now getting towards the totality of bidding where the 7spds or not fits in which again leads me to question the accepted default of ALWAYS rotating partners.

I'd admit the superiority of your method of calling as long as all players are on the same page. In some situations my partners don't call 7spds and respect that I do and both methods aren't necessarily mutually exclusive in a game - I know their 7spds bid is strength, they know mine is 'don't leave me on it.'

I know 'cheating' will always be a concern - legitimately or for Milo and Thomas, part of their paranoid delusion - and there are benefits from not being stuck with a new or crap player. I'd personally enjoy the opportunity to play with fixed partners for a few games to learn/apply and consolidate learning the intricacies of a fixed partner for a few games. Not suggesting changing status quo but every now and then not rotate where all players are comfortable with their partners and the fact that some may want the opportunity to discuss the hand in some detail afterwards.

Lee:
Tobes

The points you make about:

1. Current standards of calling
2. Current levels of sophistry in bidding

are of such merit they deserve a fresh post rather than to get lost in this one. I say that without implicitly or explicity accepting your comments on my own standard of play/bidding.

I'm going to start a new one on the point.

Table Talk on the ABC

2009-03-21T10:10:00.001+04:00

Click here to listen

The card game Euchre is played around family tables and senior citizens clubs throughout Australia. Called the 'poor man's bridge', it has been linked to card games as far away as Holland, France, Spain and Germany and was written about in England as early as the 1800s.

Although it is still played in pockets of the world, gone are the days of big tournaments for schoolkids. As ageing euchre players disappear, so do the secrets of a simple game played with bowers, tricks and partners.

Laura Grace ventures outside her euchre-playing family home to explore the origins of the game. Instead she finds out more about euchre players like herself.

"Elsie Brown"

2009-03-05T16:03:00.000+04:00

Over the past six years I have sailed much of the UAE coast in my gaff rigged trailer-sailer, "Elsie Brown".

Named after my maternal grandmother, she is a stripped-planked Evening Swan designed by Paul Fisher built in Melbourne by Chris van der Cratts. I am shipping her home in May 2009 and will berth her at the Yaringa Boat Harbour in Westernport Bay. She has a shallow bilge/shoal keel ideal for the shallow waters of the Arabian Gulf and Westerport Bay. She is easily beached and sits upright on the sand until the tide returns. She has twin berths (convertable to a double), a portapotty and a small galley.

Ashore on a small sand island five kilometres west of Abu Dhabi. The traditional owners, who have a date-palm plantation on the island, kindly let me camp on the beach for a few nights while I explored the neighbouring islands.

Sailing of the coast of Kalba just north of the Omani border on the Indian Ocean side of the UAE. Shorty after this photo was taken the winds gusted over thirty knots and I lost the bobstay holding down the bobsprit at the bow. My companion boat lost her forstay but we returned safely home.

Sailing the Musandam Peninsula

The Musandam, at the North-eastern tip of the Arabian Peninsula, overlooks the Straits of Hormuz. It is bordered to the west by the Arabian Gulf and to the East and South East by the Gulf of Oman and the Indian Ocean. Known as the "Norway" of Arabia, the Musandam Peninsula is separated from the rest of Oman by various of the United Arab Emirates - Ras al Khaimah and Fujairah.

Musandam begins where the mountains rise from the plains of Ras al Khaimah where "Elsie" is berthed. The Musandam Peninsula is difficult to reach other than by sea and is a haven for sealife and birds. Indeed, as I sailed into Khor Habilayn I was escorted by a pod of a dozen dolphins. The cliffs rise a thousand feet from the water's edge and plunge fifty metres underwater just metres from shore. This makes safe anchorages rare and the winds eratic and unpredictable. The shores are populated by friendly Omanis who still live the simple traditional fishing life of their ancestors.

Toby locked out of account LOL

2009-01-28T14:25:00.001+04:00

OK, who's the wiseass?
...and they say it pays to advertise :)

Card Cheat #2

2009-01-25T10:46:00.003+04:00

In the end card cheats get the money. If they weren't getting it, they would be extinct, and they aren't extinct.
John Scarne, 1949

Card Cheat #3

2009-01-25T10:44:00.000+04:00

"This Performance Will Prove I'm a Star!!"

2009-01-25T10:27:00.001+04:00

Colour Changing Card Trick

2009-01-25T10:20:00.001+04:00

From Quirkology.com

MSN me for a game anytime, babe :)

2009-01-24T16:29:00.006+04:00

daffers500@hotmail.com

~ enjoying non-memberland ~

Creative Ways to Use Your Friend's Account

2009-01-24T16:04:00.006+04:00

WD Toby, u virus! LOL
~ far more amusing than what she does with yours ~

Who is Daffy aka Daffers?

2009-01-24T11:47:00.009+04:00

I was a member of the Julianne Giffin 500 site for over four years. In June 2008, after over 20,000 games, I quit due to endemic cheating, rampant abuse, the incompetence and bias of the forum moderator and the disinterested and absentee administration. I published this blog to irritate the cheats and because when Richard deletes old JG500 forum threads he deprives the site of its history.

My advocacy for an honest and civil site earned me the distain and abuse of a core of dishonest and abusive members - members who still play regularly on the site today. I suported the site financially by regularly donating well above the yearly fees. I argued forcibly for a code of conduct to ensure fair play, a well-regulated forum so players could share a healthy online community and then put in the hard yards to show how this could be done. I discovered and reported a major cause of the site's lag. For these efforts I was abused by the cheats and ignored by the administration.

I have many friends on the site and continue to play as a non-member. Rumours of my transmogrification to an ancient hobbit are much exaggerated.

JG500 Secret Multiple Memberships

2009-01-24T11:39:00.018+04:00

Richard allows members to buy secret multiple accounts and change their names/icons when discovered - JG500 is possibly the only card site on the web where the administration assists the cheats in order to pay the server bills!

Some secret multiple account heroes are:

Rae/Dazza/Bundy Black: Raechelle controlled the top 5 rankings with her "preferred" partners for nearly a year until her exposure. She loves to play the victim, impersonate others, is a clever manipulator and an all round nutter. Her hubby is Dazza. She was exposed by Lee, Rat and Daffy and then confessed on the forum, "I cheated on multiple occasions... I don't prefer to be honest." She resumed playing soon after Daffy quit the site.
Abba/Runt: Abba deleted her Runt account in 2004 after her deception was uncovered. She used Runt to win elo from her rivals and then transferred it to her main account. Since then she has used Toby's account to top up her elo when needed. She is unrepentant in her use of MSN with her partners to "discuss" games in progress - sometimes by mistake she messages the wrong player LOL. Rae was one of her several "preferred" partners.
Tee/AJ: Tee laughably claimed to be trying to "clean up the site" after dominating the #1 gong for four months in 2005 by winning with one account and then transferring the elo to the other. He has been an honest player since then except for his female impersonation LOL.
Benno/Elias: Benno is a major MSN cheat, mummy's boy and tool. His cheating was exposed when his shamed partner admitted using Toby's account with him and apologized on the forum. Benno just ran away and hid under a rock. He slunk back months later and pretended it never happened LOL. He needs his nappy changed regularly and likes lots of enemas.
Funky Chicken/Rogue: The original and the best, he rarely plays now.

If you want another account to cheat with send $20 to Richard. If you're broke ask Toby for his password and transfer his elo into your account. He's a great 500 player and his elo will recover quickly - then you can do it again and again and again... he's always happy to oblige if you stroke his ego a bit.

Lee and I introduced rotating partnerships a few years ago to combat the endemic cheating. This proved to be very effective and popular and since that time the site has seen far less cheating. However, JG500 is still crawling with sad fools like those above who need to bolster their low self-esteem by cheating on their friends. Most long-term members know about them but don't care, preferring instead a quiet day of cards in the sun before they are wheeled inside for their rusks and soup.

Join JG500 by all means to support the site, but be aware...

JG500 forum screws up yet again?

2009-01-22T21:11:00.061+04:00

This week saw Flippa (aka the Mad Cow) once again abusing her fellow members. Click here to read this week's deleted forum thread where the Mad Cow accuses another member of being a pedophile.

Goodbye!

2008-06-07T23:02:00.001+04:00

Prudence - in this case it is NOT called for!

2008-06-06T18:17:00.016+04:00

Once again, in the current Prudence thread, the JG500 forum has demonstrated its need for an efficient and effective moderation system. The technology of the current forum does not allow the moderators to do their job properly.

Were the JG500 Forum a Forumer or Google/Yahoo/MSN Groups forum the moderators could have deleted this thread as soon as it appeared. Instead they have to go cap in hand to JG500 Admin and hope he has the time to do it eventually. This is not how moderated forums work! Does anyone else think this system doesn't make any sense? Or do most members come to the JG500 forum for cheap cyber-soap opera titillation and entertainment?

Anders, the JG500 Moderator has glibly criticized my concerns yet has produced little, if nothing, of any real value or use. I'm not trying to score cheap shots, nor am I engaged in self-promotion. In the spirit of his Code of Conduct I am seriously discussing matters of club concern. I have backed my proposals with working demonstrations and with financial donations. Does he have a problem with that? Does this go against his code? Does he find it awkward when people he doesn't like offer better solutions to complex problems than his answers? Perhaps he should try and address the issues and answer the questions rather than shooting the messenger.

Would he care to explain how effective and efficient his moderated forum actually is after its first month of operation? Can he explain why he drafted a Code of Conduct but then neglected to put in place a forum with the technology to enforce it? Can he explain why his solution results in much more work for Richard rather than less? Would he care to comment on Sharon's scathing indictment of his half-baked steam-powered mess? Does he gauge his successes by the effort he expends or by the results he achieves? Is he up to the job he appointed himself to do?
play500.blogspot.com/2008/05/failure-to-moderate.html

Is this Daffers blogging or Anders moderating?

___________________________________

In light of the histrionic Prudence thread the Wikipedia extract below is an interesting read. Does remind you of anyone? I tested as high on the histrionic scale myself on the 4degreez Personality Disorder Test. Try it out for yourself - its fun, and a little introspection doesn't hurt!

Histrionic personality disorder

• •

Histrionic personality disorder (HPD) is a personality disorder characterized by a pattern of excessive emotionality and attention-seeking, including an excessive need for approval and inappropriate seductiveness, usually beginning in early adulthood.

The essential feature of the histrionic personality disorder is an excessive pattern of emotionality and attention-seeking behavior. These individuals are lively, dramatic, enthusiastic, and flirtatious. They may be inappropriately sexually provocative, express strong emotions with an impressionistic style, and be easily influenced by others.

The literature differentiates HPD according to gender. Women with HPD are described as self-centered, self-indulgent, and intensely dependent on others. They are emotionally labile and cling to others in the context of immature relationships. Females with HPD over-identify with others; they project their own unrealistic, fantasied intentions onto people with whom they are involved. They are emotionally shallow and have difficulty understanding others or themselves in any depth. Selection of marital or sexual partners is often highly inappropriate. Most all partners chosen will have symptoms of personality diseases far worse than their own. Women with HPD often tend to enter into abusive relationships with partners who increase in the abuse as time wears on. Pathology increases with the level of intimacy in relationships. Women with HPD may show inappropriate and intense anger. They may engage in self-mutilation and/or manipulative suicide threats as one aspect of general manipulative interpersonal behavior.^[1]

Males with HPD usually present problems of identity crisis, disturbed relationships, and lack of impulse control. They have antisocial tendencies and are inclined to exploit physical symptoms. These men are emotionally immature, dramatic, and shallow. Both men and women with HPD engage in disinhibited behavior.

People with this disorder are usually able to function at a high level and can be successful socially and at work. People with histrionic personality disorder usually have good social skills - but they tend to use these skills to manipulate other people and become the center of attention. Furthermore, histrionic personality disorder may affect a person's social or romantic relationships or their ability to cope with losses or failures. People with this disorder may seek treatment for depression when romantic relationships end, although this is by no means a feature exclusive to this disorder. They often fail to see their own personal situation realistically, instead tending to dramatize and exaggerate their difficulties. Responsibility for failure or disappointment is usually blamed on others. They may go through frequent job changes, as they become easily bored and have trouble dealing with frustration. Because they tend to crave novelty and excitement, they may place themselves in risky situations. All of these factors may lead to greater risk of developing depression.

Symptoms

The symptoms include:

Constant seeking of reassurance or approval.
Excessive dramatics with exaggerated displays of emotions.
Excessive sensitivity to criticism or disapproval.
Inappropriately seductive appearance or behavior.
Excessive concern with physical appearance.
A need to be the center of attention (self-centeredness).
Low tolerance for frustration or delayed gratification.
Rapidly shifting emotional states that may appear shallow to others.
Opinions are easily influenced by other people, but difficult to back up with details.
Tendency to believe that relationships are more intimate than they actually are.
Making rash decisions.
Threatening or attempting suicide to get attention.

Diagnosis

The person's appearance, behavior, and history, and a psychological evaluation are usually sufficient to establish the diagnosis. There is no test to confirm this diagnosis. Because the criteria are subjective, some people may be wrongly diagnosed as having the disorder while others with the disorder may not be diagnosed. Treatment is often prompted by depression associated with dissolved romantic relationships. Medication does little to affect this personality disorder, but may be helpful with symptoms such as depression. Psychotherapy may also be of benefit.

Diagnostic criteria

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines histrionic personality disorder as a pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention
Interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior
Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions
Consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to self
Has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail
Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion
Is suggestible, i.e., easily influenced by others or circumstances
Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are.

The International Statistical Classification of Diseases defines histrionic personality disorder as characterized by:

self-dramatization, theatricality, exaggerated expression of emotions;
suggestibility, easily influenced by others or by circumstances;
shallow and labile affectivity;
continual seeking for excitement and activities in which the patient is the centre of attention;
inappropriate seductiveness in appearance or behaviour;
over-concern with physical attractiveness.

Mnemonic

A mnemonic that can be used to remember the criteria for histrionic personality disorder is PRAISE ME:

P - provocative (or seductive) behavior
R - relationships, considered more intimate than they are
A - attention, must be at center of
I - influenced easily
S - speech (style) - wants to impress, lacks detail
E - emotional lability, shallowness

M - make-up - physical appearance used to draw attention to self
E - exaggerated emotions - theatrical

Relationships

The HPD is highly reactive. If there is another major disorder present, such as delusional disorder, then emotional intensity will create anger, rage, abuse and distance in relationships.

It is important for the therapist and family members to monitor and record all situations that trigger the HPD so that the deep underlying overload of pain can be accessed and released for therapeutic change.

Friend's websites and blogs

2008-06-03T19:13:00.004+04:00

Poll Result for an Independent Moderated Forum

2008-06-03T02:02:00.004+04:00

Voting has now closed - many thanks for your votes. The results are:

Calling Aces

2008-06-03T01:48:00.008+04:00

In Play500.com Bryce Francis says: The basic idea behind any call is to get the most points out of the pair of hands involved in that call. You must COMMUNICATE!!!. Communication must be POSITIVE. This method of calling requires calling the aces first, and your suit strengths later. Each caller must call the lowest ACE, or the joker when it is his turn to call and he or she has no aces to call. If the first caller holds the ace of spades, his first call is six spades, even if that is the only black card in his hand. A first call of six spades says to all players that that player has the ace of spades. It gives no indication of any other card in the hand. It certainly cannot be taken to indicate a strength in spades. It is just the ace.

This certainly applies to ATF500. The only modification I would make for Classic 500 is that IF you have 2 aces then call what would be your off-suit ace in preference to your trump ace. The idea of ace calling is to give your partnership an extra trick by identifying an off-suit strength.

If you have no aces then go straight to seven if you have a good hand or if the scoreline dictates a bid. Calling strength at 6 because your hand is weak just muddies the water. The exception is calling 6 strength when your team is very near the back door. I use minus 350 as my guide as to when to call strength at 6 instead of 7.

Toby Pics - courtesy of Craig

2008-06-02T16:15:00.001+04:00

Brilliant stuff, Craggers, WFD!!!

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The Three Little Bops

2008-06-01T20:00:00.002+04:00

From Wikipedia

Three Little Bops is a 1957 Looney Tunes cartoon directed by Friz Freleng, with voices by Stan Freberg and music by jazz composer/trumpeter Shorty Rogers. It is a takeoff on The Three Little Pigs, told as a hip, jazzy musical.

The Big Bad Wolf is not interested in eating the pigs, but rather joining their band. His problem is that he is a terrible trumpeter and therefore fails to endear himself to the Bops (or the audience, all of whom refer to him as a "square"). Constantly thrown out of the clubs he visits, the insulted Wolf retaliates by using his trumpet to blast away the House of Straw and the Dew Drop Inn of sticks.

The club of bricks is where he runs into problems; wolves are not permitted in the club, but he is not the least bit discouraged. Like his forefather, the Wolf runs out of breath in trying to blow away the club. Unlike his forefather, however, the Wolf resorts to other measures to make his mark. He reenters in fur coat and ukulele with his rendition of the Charleston song (cut short by slipping on a strategically-placed banana peel). He returns in the disguise of a houseplant with his trumpet but gets blasted outside by a plunger shot from the double bass. For his third try, the Wolf shows up in drum major outfit playing a big bass drum. A dart is shot into the drum, leaving him to exit in humiliation.

Finally, he shows up with a large cylinder of TNT and snaps, "I'll show those pigs that I'm not stuck! If I can't blow it down, I'll blow it up!" The fuse is blown out on his first try, so he steps back a bit and lights it from there. Unfortunately, he is too far away and his weapon explodes while he's carrying it to his target.

The Bops hear his trumpeting from "the other place" (hell), and it has improved dramatically. One of pigs proudly replies, "The Big Bad Wolf, he learned the rule: you gotta get hot to play real cool!" Thus the Wolf achieves his goal in afterlife: becoming a member of the Bops.

Instrument Credits are believed to be:

Vocals - Stan Freberg
Saxophone - Art Pepper
Trumpet/flugelhorn - Shorty Rogers
Piano - Pete Jolly
Guitar - unknown
Bass - possibly Joe Mondragon
Drums - Shelly Manne

This is one of only two Warner Brothers cartoons to give on-screen credit to an actor other than Mel Blanc during the period of Blanc's exclusive contract with the studio. The other short is The Mouse That Jack Built, which credits the cast of The Jack Benny Program.

Pat's Visit to Mt Tambourine

2008-06-01T19:36:00.001+04:00

Courtesy of Craig

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Pat's Live Game in Brisbane

2008-06-01T19:29:00.001+04:00

Courtesy of Craig

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Yoinks and awaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!

2008-06-01T16:51:00.005+04:00

Craig - you asked for it. I agree, its brilliant! Chuck Jones' Daffy is my favourite.

From Wikipedia

The film features Daffy Duck in the role of legendary outlaw Robin Hood, and opens to the strains of his playing an instrument similar to an archlute or bouzouki. As he prances along singing, he trips and tumbles down a bank into a lake. Watching is Porky Pig, here a Friar Tuck figure, who laughs uproariously at Daffy's inglorious plunge. The annoyed Daffy tries to prove his skill with a "quarterstaff" (Daffy: "Actually, it's a buck-and-a-quarter quarterstaff, but I'm not telling him [Porky] that."), but manages to hit himself in the face with it, bending his bill in what becomes a recurring visual gag throughout the film. He tries again, but while he is spinning his quarterstaff, Porky stops it with a mere toothpick, resulting in Daffy falling back into the lake.

Having given up trying to impress the friar, Daffy attempts to leave, but Porky follows and asks him if he knows the whereabouts of Robin Hood's hideout as he wants to join his band of outlaws. Daffy proudly announces that he is Robin Hood, but Porky disbelieves him. To prove himself, Daffy informs Porky that he will attempt to rob a rich traveller on a bouncing mule (and give his money to some poor unworthy slob). Daffy fails in each and every attempt he makes to stop the traveller, usually injuring himself in the process, be it accidentally firing himself from his own bow, or slamming into a succession of trees while trying to swing on a rope. Eventually the rich traveller, oblivious to Daffy's attempts to rob him, reaches his castle unharmed. The frustrated Daffy gives up, and in the final scene walks on with a shaven head and wearing a habit, having decided to become a friar himself: "Never mind joining me, I'll join you. Shake hands with Friar Duck (a pun of the name Friar Tuck)." As the film irises out, Daffy's bill bends back up one more time.

Other notable lines:

Daffy, fighting with his $1.25 quarter staff : "Ho! Haha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!" (quarter staff bounces off log, bending his bill. He straightens it back to normal, and starts speaking to himself) "Let's see now. Something amiss here... hmm, I'll run through it. Ho, haha, guard, turn, parry, dodge, spin, ha, thrust." (bill bends again) "Got it." (straightens bill, and starts his fighting moves again.) "Ho! Haha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin!" (Porky comes up and holds a toothpick up against the quarterstaff while Daffy is spinning it, stopping and causing Daffy to spin instead. Daffy then falls back down into the lake)
See yon rich unwary traveller? I'll rob him of his gold, and give it to some poor unworthy slob. That'll prove that I'm Robin Hood, hmm? Prithy, hmm?
"Yoicks . . . and away!" (Daffy swings from a treetop and hits another tree) "Yoicks . . . . and away!" (Daffy swings from the other treetop and hits another tree. This happens a few more times, slurring his speech a little more each time, until he's at ground level.) "Why you...!" (Daffy gets an axe and starts chopping down the last tree he hit. Eventually, all the trees that got in his way are now out of his path, and he is back on top of the first tree.) "Now then, yoicks . . . . . and, away. . ." (Daffy swings over all the trees he's chopped down and hits a rock)
"Ho ho, very funny; Ha ha, it is to laugh."
"Oh, knock it off. How jolly can you get?"

The Mind of a Card Cheat

2008-06-01T12:43:00.007+04:00

From Card Shark Online

Whenever cards are played there is always an opportunity for cheating. There is, however, a difference between a card shark and a card cheat. A shark is definitely a cheat, but a cheat is not necessarily a shark. A cheat may be someone who just happens to take advantage of a situation. Or it may be someone who just likes to gain advantage by cheating, but doesn't really know how to cheat. Eventually both of these kinds of cheats will get caught, simply because they are not good strategists.

A "shark" is a different animal. He not only cheats at the game because there is an opportunity. He is a strategist, an expert in the art of cheating and the average player does not stand a chance against guys like this. Comparing common cheats with sharks is like comparing impulse shoplifters with members of an organized crime gang. A real card shark is a seasoned "black belt" expert. Average players will never know what hit them - if they even realize they got stung.

It is not to say that every card shark is of the same caliber, nor is it true that they all know everything about cheating at cards. On the contrary, most sharks specialize in just a few strategies that work well for them. They may be familiar with other cheating methods or even not, in fact they may even be misinformed about cheating methods outside their field and even fall victims of other sharks. Most sharks are in it for the money, they are not lecturers nor professors. If one thing works for them, they do it well and look for another "client".

Sharks come in all shapes and colors. For example, take the three card monte guy. He is a smelly street guy in worn out clothes, who probably lives in a dump (or at least it looks that way). There is not much appeal in this guy. In fact from his appearance you would not be surprised if you found out, that he has a criminal record and never did anything decent in his life.

"A cheat doesn't necessarily have to cheat. In fact, the best cheats will only cheat when it is absolutely necessary to do so. This way they decrease the odds at getting caught."

Now take the other extreme. In the Hollywood film The Sting Paul Newman and Robert Redford played the roles of two con men. In one scene Paul Newman even demonstrates a second deal. He is obviously a card shark, but this type of shark you like. He is your hero and you do not care much that he is also a criminal. This is how Hollywood portrays card sharks. In real life there may be a handful of charismatic sharks who look like movie stars, but the real-time sharks look a lot more like average guys, from any background.

So lets talk about cheats in general. What makes them tick? Why do they cheat?

A cheat doesn't necessarily have to cheat. In fact, the best cheats will only cheat when it is absolutely necessary to do so. This way they decrease the odds at getting caught. Even if they play a square game from beginning to end, they are still cheats, simply because they entered the game with the intention to do so.

All a smart cheat wants is an edge other players don't have. This edge translates into a profit over a long term play. It is like a tank full of water with a miniature hole on the bottom. If you put a container under it, all the water will eventually end up inside it. The same kind of edge brings millions of Dollars into casinos every year. Except casinos, don't have to cheat, the rules of the games are set up so that they have a mathematical edge. Some people would consider this not fair play and they may argue that this is a form of cheating, other people may disagree with that. Those are just different points of view.

When a cheat loses a hand he thinks of this as an investment - not a loss. He knows that he has to keep his victims motivated if he wants to keep them playing and raising bets. If his victims are regular customers he must even let them go home as winners some time. How else could he keep their spirits up and not make them suspicious? After all he just lets them keep some of their own money on temporary basis. Next time he will collect dividends, capital gains and his initial investment and at the end of the month, he will balance out his client's accounts so that he keeps the profit. It is like any other business, you have to keep your clients happy, get them Christmas cards etc. This is not like some of the giant corporate financial institutions, where they only promise to you that "the right relationship is everything", these guys actually make it the "right relationship" - if they know their business. Those cheats who do not get caught are not in it for a fast game - they do not have any intention in biting off the hand that feeds them.

Three card monte mobs operate at a totally apposite principle. They take your cash and run. After that you never see them again. You eventually figure out that you were cheated but there is very little you can do. Plus you kind of get over the twenty Dollar loss. They don't want to establish a relationship with you - all they want is your cash, they want it fast and then they want to deal with another sucker (all right, let's call him a customer). You will never get a Christmas card from any one of them and they don't give a damn if your feelings are hurt. Sure, if you are dumb enough to come back, they will be willing to take more cash from you, but if you make too much noise, they will walk away from you or even push you away.

Those are the two extremely different approaches in cheating. One is "white" the other is "black" -- in-between you will find all possible "shades of gray".

Online card games cheat exposed

2008-06-01T12:32:00.001+04:00

Has to know when to hold 'em

The Inquirer By Nick Farrell: Thursday, 18 October 2007, 8:34 AM

PLAYERS of the online Absolute Poker game have found that someone in the company was involved in a cheating operation.

According to the New York Times, punters playing the game got a bit suspicious when one of the players seemed to know what cards were in their hands.

Normally at this point there would be lots of close ups of people's faces, chewing of cigars until someone spat and the cheater would be shot dead. Unfortunately since such action was impossible online, one of the players who’d been cheated requested that Absolute Poker provide hand histories from the tournament.

Absolute Poker accidentally sent a file that contained all sorts of private information that the poker site would never normally release. The file contained every player’s cards, observations of the tables, and even the IP addresses of every person playing.

The Times thinks that someone in Absolute Poker knew that the cheating was taking place and sent too much information to the players so that they could take appropriate action.

Each game was monitored by an 'observer' who is a guest who can’t see any of the players’ cards. When this observer was watching the game the cheater did not lose and seemed to know when another player had the best hand.

The gamers looked at who this observer was and in each case it was Scott Tom, part-owner of Absolute Poker, who was operating from the company's servers.

In otherwords he was tipping off the cheater the cards of the other players.

Absolute Poker has denied everything.

RIP Harvey Korman, 81; versatile Emmy-winning comedian

2008-05-31T15:31:00.007+04:00

Los Angeles Times : The late Harvey Korman, second from right, in a 1968 skit on "The Carol Burnett Show."

Harvey Korman, an Emmy-winning comedic actor best known for playing the self-described "luminous second banana" for a decade on television's "The Carol Burnett Show" and for starring in such Mel Brooks films as "Blazing Saddles," has died. He was 81.

With a knack for physical humor and oddball accents, Korman was a master sketch comic who did his best-known work on Burnett's variety show beginning in 1967 in an ensemble that included Tim Conway. "It's a 45-year friendship," Conway said. "It was a great ride; we worked together probably 30 years, plus the Burnett show, which was about as good as it gets." Conway said Korman had "a complete understanding of comedy and comedy timing."

Korman and Conway developed an uncanny rapport that made them arguably one of television's most lethal comic teams; Conway's on-camera ad-libs often made Korman crack up; producers wisely kept them in the show.

One of their favorite routines from the Burnett show was the dentist sketch, "where I kind of anesthetize my entire body with Novocain" while trying to fill Korman's teeth, Conway told The Times on Thursday. "They play it at all the dental schools, as kind of an introduction on how not to do it," Conway said.

Korman made more than 30 films, including four comedies directed by Brooks, who first discovered him when his wife, the late Anne Bancroft, singled Korman out on "The Carol Burnett Show."

"My wife said, 'You've got to see this guy. They're doing the Andrews Sisters [in a sketch] and this Harvey Korman is the best of the bunch.' . . . Harvey was so funny. When I was putting together 'Blazing Saddles,' I just knew he was a natural" for the role of Hedley Lamarr in the 1974 Western satire.

Brooks called Korman "a major, major talent, and he could have very easily have done Shakespearean drama. That's how gifted and talented Harvey was. . . . I loved working with him."

"I had some real problems working with Harvey," Brooks told The Times on Thursday. "I used to look past his eyes. . . . If our eyes met, that's the end of the take. We would break up."

Brooks also cast Korman in "High Anxiety" (1977), "History of the World -- Part 1" (1981) and "Dracula: Dead and Loving It" (1995).

Duck Amuck

2008-05-31T10:06:00.006+04:00

Duck Amuck is a surreal 1951 animated cartoon directed by Chuck Jones and produced by Warner Bros. Cartoons. The short was released in early 1953 by The Vitaphone Corporation, the short subject division of Warner Bros. Pictures, as part of the Merrie Melodies series. It stars Daffy Duck, who is tormented by a sadistic, unseen animator who constantly changes Daffy's location, clothing, voice, physical appearance, and even shape. Pandemonium reigns throughout the cartoon as Daffy attempts to steer the action back to some kind of normality, only for the animator to either ignore him or, more frequently, to over-literally interpret his increasingly frantic demands. In 1994 it was voted #2 of The 50 Greatest Cartoons of all time by members of the animation field.

According to director Chuck Jones, this film demonstrated for the first time that animation can create characters with a recognizable personality, independent of their appearance, milieu, or voice. Although in the end, the animator is revealed to be Daffy's friend and rival Bugs Bunny (who famously declares "Ain't I a stinker?"), according to Jones the ending is just for comedic value: Jones (the director) is speaking to the audience directly, asking "Who is Daffy Duck anyway? Would you recognize him if I did this to him? What if he didn't live in the woods? Didn't live anywhere? What if he had no voice? No face? What if he wasn't even a duck anymore?" In all cases, it is obvious that Daffy is still Daffy; not all cartoon characters can claim such distinctive personality.

Mel Blanc does the voices. It was directed by Chuck Jones with a story by Michael Maltese. The film contains many examples of self-referential humor, breaking the fourth wall.

In 1999 the film was deemed "culturally significant" by the United States Library of Congress and selected for preservation in the National Film Registry. This was the second of three animated shorts by Jones to receive this honor (the others are 1957's What's Opera, Doc? and 1955's One Froggy Evening). Jones has the distinction of being the only director (as of 2006) with three animated shorts in the registry.

The cartoon's plot was essentially replicated in one of Jones' later cartoons, Rabbit Rampage (1955), in which Bugs Bunny turns out to be the victim of the silly animator (Elmer Fudd). A similar plot was also included in an episode of Baby Looney Tunes, only Bugs was the victim, Daffy was the animator, and it was made on a computer instead of a pencil and paper.

In Looney Tunes Comics Issue #94, Bugs Bunny gets his back at Daffy Duck by making him the victim, in switching various movie roles, from Duck Twacy in "Who Killed Daffy Duck," a video game character, and a talk show host, and they always wound up with Daffy starring in Moby Dick (the story's running gag). After this, Bugs comments, "Eh, dis guy needs a new agent."

From Wikipedia

Just who is the Duck?

2008-05-31T00:28:00.008+04:00

Daffy in his masterpiece, Duck Amuck, directed by Chuck Jones

It's no wonder Daffy Duck has a split personality. In his early years, Daffy was manic, explosive, and unpredictable, engaging in adventures that seemed outlandish even to him. As his personality gained depth at the hands of Warner Bros. cartoons' directors, the little black duck became more self-analytical, competitive, peevish, paranoid, and neurotic. Eventually, Daffy found himself more and more at the mercy of a universe that seemed to favor everyone but him.

So why do audiences love him? Despite his failures, Daffy, like the Greek hero Sisyphus, is a victim of injustice who continuously protests. And it's his refusal to surrender his will to the whims of the conspiring universe that makes him heroic. How could one not feel sorry for an ill-equipped duck with Daffy's voice that just can't seem to get a break? At least Daffy aims high. And when he fails, he resets the bar . . . even higher.

Daffy Duck has evolved from the talents of Tex Avery, Friz Freleng, Bob Clampett, and Chuck Jones. It's not like he's a total failure. Daffy's been an Oscar presenter and he's starred or appeared in more than 150 cartoons and movies, often as a self-described hero matched with his polar opposite and sidekick -- the bashful and far less brash Porky Pig. Over the course of several hilarious cartoons, again and again, Daffy always manages to get the short end of the schtick.

In Drip-Along Daffy and My Little Duckaroo the comic pair, portraying Wild West lawmen, get more than they bargained for when they face desperado Nasty Canasta. Duck Dodgers in the 24½th Century, has space star "Duck Dodgers" (Daffy) and "Eager Young Space Cadet" (Porky), traveling to Planet X to battle with Marvin The Martian while in search of Illudium Phosdex, the shaving cream atom. In Deduce, You Say Daffy is "Dorlock Homes" and Porky is "Watkins", Baker Street sleuths who aim to capture the Shropshire Slasher. It is Watkins, the sidekick, and not Homes, that is successful.

In Chuck Jones' masterpiece Duck Amuck, Daffy is antagonized by an unseen animator who torments him by switching backgrounds and props, fooling with the soundtrack, and humiliating him by erasing and re-drasniff.os.wing him. Fittingly, the culprit is none other than Bugs Bunny, whose astounding success would, over the years, become the lightning rod for Daffy's envy and resentment. In shorts such as Jones' Rabbit Fire and Rabbit Seasoning and Freleng's A Star Is Bored, the pair carried on a timeless screen battle of wits, with Daffy entering the battle mostly unarmed.

In the end, he may have to re-align his bill and sweep up his dignity in a dustpan, but Daffy Duck always gets something that, unfortunately, he never really hears: a grateful audience's laughter.

Article from Looney Toons

How to deal with abusive forum members

2008-05-30T19:49:00.003+04:00

From Communityspark

Sometimes, regardless of what you try to do abusive forum members keep coming back and causing trouble. This article will teach you how to take effective action against abusive forum members to prevent them from ruining your online community.

What are your rules?

Online communities need rules. If you don’t have any published rules, how can you expect members to abide by them? It is impossible for anyone to break the rules if there aren’t any in the first place. You will never be able to deal effectively with abusive forum members unless your site has rules, so make sure you have some in place before you try to deal with abusive members.

Editing posts of abusive forum members

If a forum member makes a post that is against the site rules, you should edit it. If you edit the post of a member, it is important that you contact them to explain the reasons why you have made the edit. Your message should be professional and constructive: you do not want to alienate your forum members. By remaining friendly and professional, you are showing that you still value them, and want them to remain part of your community. You are also reducing the likelihood of them taking offence at your actions, and therefore preventing a potential escalation of the situation. A good example message would be:

Hi (username)

I recently had to edit your post at (insert url of post) because it was in breach of our site rules. Our site rules do not permit (insert rule that was broken here). You can review our site rules in full at (insert url of site rules page). Thanks for your understanding - if you are unsure of anything or wish to discuss this further, please get in touch.

I look forward to reading more of your posts in the future, and thank you for being a valued member of the community.

Regards

(your name)

How tolerant are you going to be?

It is important that you determine how many warnings you are willing to give members who persistently break your site rules before you’ll consider taking further action against them. I would recommend allowing members to make no more than five mistakes per month before taking further action. Regardless of your policy, by the time you contact the member with their second warning you should include the following:

I understand that people make mistakes from time to time, however this is now the (insert number) time I have had to contact you regarding your posts. Unfortunately, if you continue to break the site rules I will be left with no choice but to take further action against you. This could include a suspension of your posting privileges, or in extreme cases the deletion of your account at (site name).

Again, ensure that you come across as professional and keep the lines of communication open. You don’t want to lose this member, you simply want them to abide by your site rules. Keeping the lines of communication open will help clear up any misunderstandings and make it far easier to encourage them to adjust their behaviour compared to other, more rudimentary means.

Deleting posts of abusive forum members

Deleting posts should be reserved for the most serious breaches of your site rules. Remember that if you delete the opening post of a thread, you will be deleting the entire thread, so make sure you only delete content if you are left with no other choice. Again, if you delete a post you should always contact the poster with your reasons.

Suspending abusive forum members

A temporary suspension may give a hot-headed member time to cool off, and should be considered before deleting their account and banning them. Again, make sure you communicate with your member so they know what action you are taking, and why.

Deleting abusive forum members

If you are completely unable to get through to a persistent rule breaker, you may need to bite the bullet and delete their account. You should have warned the member about their conduct on a number of occasions before taking this step - it should never come as a surprise to an abusive member when they arrive at your site to find their account deleted.

If you decide to delete a member’s account, you should do so as discreetly as possible. Don’t make a public announcement about the action you have taken; remain professional, and respect your ex-member’s privacy. If you start posting their username and reasons why you have deleted their account in public, you risk a community backlash and the possibility of the banned member developing a grudge, turning them into a persistent problem.

Banning abusive forum members

You may find that the member you have removed from your online community develops a grudge against you and your site. If this happens, they will try any and all methods possible to cause you problems. They will likely sign up for a new account, use different email addresses and different IP addresses in order to make it more difficult for you to prevent them registering for a new account.

The steps I follow to ban abusive forum members are as follows:

1. Ban the username
2. Ban the email address
3. Ban the IP address(es) commonly associated with the abusive member

As experienced forum moderators and developers will know, these methods are not always successful. If your banned member continues to join the forum under aliases, you should consider temporarily making new accounts inactive until you manually approve them. Very often you will notice patterns to the information the banned member uses to register - they may have a favourite email provider, they may use similar names, they may try to register at certain times of the day. Normally, after a day or so of failed attempts to re-register, the banned member will give up.

Remember that if your banned member does get through from time to time, it is not a problem taking action against them - one click and you have deleted their posts, another click and you have deleted their account. The process is far more time-consuming and inconvenient for the banned member - stick to your guns, and you will always win.

Kentucky Fried Chicken makes black men impotent

2008-05-29T16:00:00.009+04:00

Nice work there detective daffy (Flippa)

Kentucky Fried Chicken has been claimed to be owned by the Klan and that the chicken is laced with a drug that makes only black men impotent. Ironically, the franchise is actually owned by an African-American.
Kentucky Fried Chicken's Colonel Sanders' will was rumored to have left 10% of KFC's profits to the Ku Klux Klan.

http://www.snopes.com/business/alliance/sanders.asp

According to numerous websites, and, in particular, urban legend expert Jan Harold Brunvand, author of numerous books on the subject of urban legends, beginning in the 1980s and continuing through the '90s, Church's Chicken became the victim of two rumors: 1) that the company was run by the KKK and 2) that the company used saltpeter, or a similar substance, to make black men sterile. Often, the rumors were combined into one story, to make it seem even more plausible. However, as with all urban legends, none of this has ever been substantiated; in fact, as has been noted, Church's has often been instrumental in the encouragement of African-American-owned-and-operated businesses and is currently presided over by the industry's first black female.

Daffers vs Alien8

2008-05-29T14:12:00.003+04:00

DUCK DODGERS IN THE 24 1/2 CENTURY - a classic!

Daffers' Vitriolic Hall of Fame

2008-05-28T16:32:00.030+04:00

"It's mine, mine, mine, I tell ya - all MINE!!!"

You are one paranoid sick duck you should be shot (Anetta)
Nailed me in ten words - brilliant!

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Daffy's tantrum didn't last long! More will leave, after he is rude to them. Site will never keep going with site police like him. (Rae 2006)
Translation: Daffy caught me cheating on multiple occasions and I was forced to admit it on the forum before I slunk away.

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You abuse people at free will and expect people to respect you or actually take what you have to say in consideration. Anyone who has seen these forums over the last few years will have seen all the crap you go on about and the trouble you are always trying to stir up. (Benno)
Translation: Daffy caught me plundering Toby's elo with a friend so I could get to #1 - my friend confessed on the forum but I was too humiliated so I slunk away for a few months.

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Daffy I am so upset with what you have said, I have never did this, now I want you to have the balls and say who I cheated with. When I read what you hypocrite dude.wrote, I immediately said to my daughter this a f......ing lie. You are 1 hypocrite dude. (Abba)
Daffy watched me using Toby's account with two other cheats in a locked room to transfer his elp to my account - I won 16 out of 16 games in less than 15 minutes in a locked room late at night to get to #1. Fast play, eh?
The friggin japs are a real weird mob. last poll i read, the new generation of japs dont even eat whale meat. i figure its like a battle btween japs and aussies. who owns what bit of land. o yes, im rascist. japs want expansion, can understand that been in japan, and sure is one smog haven. but.... whales are worth preserving. not sure if japs are. (Flippa)
OK, so it's not about Daffers but it's a great post, eh?
The duck's a real tool but a great lay! (Toby)
True.
It makes me happy that there is someone with less of a life than me. (Anders) Come on Jeanie, you can you much better than that!
Daffy is rude. (Loryn)
Original.
To observe the degeneration from citing evidence and making arguments to name calling and animal fetish jokes gives me great satisfaction. (The 4th)
OK, so it's slightly better than Loryn's.

Did I miss anyone out?

You have to draw the line somewhere!

2008-05-28T12:56:00.013+04:00

Let's grow up, moderate our own forum and
save Richard time, money and bandwidth. For example:

Let's Talk 500 - hosted by Forumer
Play 500 - hosted by Google Groups

Either example could be owned, managed and moderated by the JG500 moderation team on behalf of the membership. Both could be integrated into the existing JG500 site. Neither would require any work by Richard. Both are free. Both offer features the current forum does not have: extended profiles, personal messaging, file uploads, embedded pictures and videos etc.

Daffers in Non-Memberland?

2008-05-27T20:34:00.011+04:00

It must have been a rabbit wearing a duck mask!
Watch the full movie here.

The 4th wrote:

This member happily fleeces average members of ELO points, in 2-player games - but abuses the same people when they play at the same level as a partner, in a 4-player game, after a loss.

This member will play a 4-player game with a non-member for 2 rounds of a rotation, and ALWAYS "have to go" when it's the member's turn to partner the non-member. The member can always be found in another room next door, 5 minutes later.

The rotating 4-some system was established to both reduce incidents of cheating and provide the most level playing field for all players. To abuse this system, by milking 2 relatively easy wins from a member/non-member team and then running away when it's your turn to partner the non is too lame - even for me. I respect my own ability (real or imagined) too much, to pull such a stunt.

This is ELO manipulation - that is increasing your odds of winning by any means other than you own ability in a fair game played on a level playing field.

For the record, I'm not against ELO manipulation. If someone wants to voluntarily give their ELO to other members, that's their business. But our mystery member is quite vocal on the evils of ELO manipulation.

You can't have your cake and eat it too.

Enough innuendo. It is Daffy. The 1st time it happened, I wrote it off as bad luck. The 2nd time it happened, I became suspicious. The 3rd time it happened, a pattern had been established. After posting this message, other members correctly guessed the culprit (in-room chat) and told me they had similar experiences.

Stacking the teams is like stacking the deck. Just plain unfair.

Good grief - Daffers sighted in non-memberland? Nay laddie, it must surely have been a rabbit wearing a duck mask.

I avoid non-memberland because of the very stunts Grumma is eluding to in another topical thread. The place is crawling with undressed members, albeit most with nicer agendas than others, but with some whose motives are downright pathological. I do play there with my good mate Gus, an undressed member, and very occasionally when invited to partner with other members. Being the pompous old killjoy we all love to hate, however, I don't partner non-members without a credit reference and a CV.

By the way, I thought you "won" ELO off other members in 2 handers. Still, if he wants to call it "fleecing" I'll play along with his fantasy. If he comes dressed as Little Bo Peep, cries and wails a lot and brings a few shorn sheep next time perhaps I'll dress up as the Big Bad Duck - could be fun ;))

But why did the twat keep coming into my rooms night after night, month after month, challenging me to 2 handed games of ATF500? Did the sheep want to get shorn? Didn't he know that the evil duck was lurking there waiting to fleece the poor bugger of his silly ELO? Didn't he notice that the first two members who joined us were always welcomed when they asked to join in? Doesn't he realise good partners critique, but don't "abuse", each others play but never that of their opponents? There's no explaining some clowns in cyberspace.

Lee Calls for JG500 to Bring Back the Biff? Vote Now...

2008-05-26T21:59:00.004+04:00

The Voting Booth is Now Open Stage Right

Richard and Julianne - kudos for a job well-done

2008-05-26T09:30:00.010+04:00

Oftentimes young teenagers forget to tell their Mum and Dad how much they love and appreciate them when they rebel, as all young adolescents do, and criticise the very people who feed and house them. And so it is with a few of us rambunctious cyber-adolescents on JG500.

I want to express my ongoing admiration and appreciation to Richard and Julianne for their hard work and support for the club. I know I express myself critically and directly and tender egos often misinterpret this as personal abuse. Although I play the ball and never the player sometimes the player's head gets very near the ball and, well, heads are the same shape as the ball aren't they? So, I hope my comments about JG500 are seen only as my continued support for the club and my desire to suggest improvements and offer assistance.

See: Forum Moderation Another Victim of Lag

Get a Life!

2008-05-26T02:08:00.007+04:00

Yesterday a JG500 member told me I needed to get more fun out of life.

Daffers hard at work having fun in the Musandam

The irony was dripping of the screen as I was thoroughly enjoying my weekend chatting with my wife, planning my upcoming holiday, updating my blog and playing 500 with my mates. Conversely, this member was thoroughly miserable, whinging yet again about never being able to get a good game at the site, and very strung out for lack of sleep.

I enjoy my life - a lot! I have a great job teaching wonderful students; I sail up and down some beautiful coasts; I play 500 with some loverly people; and I enjoy getting up the noses of cheats and their defenders. But I don't give out foolish unasked for life advice - and I expect the same in return.

What I admire about the local people where I live is that they seem to know far better than many of my compatriots where to draw the line. They would consider it rude and uncouth to give a casual acquaintance life advice. So do I!

Forum Moderation Another Victim of Lag?

2008-05-24T19:00:00.018+04:00

Isn't it time we grew up and took responsibility for our own forum? Then we'd only have ourselves to blame instead of Richard, and his limited time could then be spent on what he does the best instead of refereeing a dysfunctional mob of addicted card players ;)

Richard would probably love to lose this forum's load from his server and his busy day. In our email correspondence about my "Let's Talk 500" demonstration forum he said:

I'm happy to switch the current forums over (but) I guess this whole thing would be a lot more attractive to me if I didn't have to do any work... This would help my bandwidth costs too.

Free moderated forums are easy to set up and administer, whether they are hosted by Google/Yahoo/MSN Groups or Forumer. As Jon pointed out, it wouldn't take much work to incorporate an independent forum into this site and they could be made to look as one.

Let's Talk 500 - a demonstration of an independent feature rich moderated forum for players of 500
Expired JG500 Forum Thread on Let's Talk 500
Play 500 Google Group - a demonstration of a basic independent moderated forum setup in ten minutes
My email correspondence with Richard about an independent forum for JG500

The JG500 Administration has always seemed disinterested in its own forum, and the forum's culture of abuse is, in part, a product of their apparent lack of understanding of how online communities function and how much work they require. We need an independent feature-rich forum governed and moderated by members elected by the membership. Sound familiar?

Sharon wrote:

Hi everyone,

I wanted to publicly state that my role as one of the site forum moderators is over.

I was initially approached by Anders in early April and agreed to be involved in both the set up of the Forum Code of Conduct and in moderating the site. My reasons for doing so were solid and I felt it was an extremely necessary step to move the site forward into the future.

It was not an easy process or task and the original Moderation Team (which included Grumma and another member as well) all spent many hours of our own time on a completely voluntary basis in meeting with the rest of the team to talk over our views, issues, processes etc, as well as drafting, reviewing and finalising do?@!ents and emails.

Forum moderation was launched in early May.

Since that time I have become increasingly disillusioned and incredibly disappointed with the level of support offered to us by the Administrators of this site.

Our moderation team has met and made specific recommendations to Richard via email about steps he needs to do in order to act on our decisions - emails to be sent to members who breach the code and offending posts to be removed. Despite the lapse of a significant period of time, Richard has not acted on our suggestions.

I have had email correspondence with Richard today. His responses to my questions, comments and suggestions were entirely unsatisfactory to me. I am extremely frustrated by Richard's lack of action and support which he purports to have for the moderation process.

As a consequence I am unable to continue my personal involvement in moderating the site and seriously question the value in having moderators at all given the current logistical arrangements.
The effectiveness and capacity to act of the moderation team is significantly compromised by the set up as it is now.

It is very unfortunate as my aim was certainly always about improving the site for everyone.

I wish to pay tribute to the energy, drive and level-headedness of Anders who is an incredibly mature and impressive young man. Grumma and our other original team member spent many hours on do?@!ents and processes and their work was important and highly valued. Brillo has been a clear thinking, sensible and essential part of our moderation team.

A big sigh of relief and warm regards from,

Sharon
(Who is now looking forward to spending her 500 time playing cards rather than moderating!)

BL Shaz but WD for trying.

At The End Of Life

2008-05-23T10:40:00.002+04:00

We have a lot of fun in class making movies. Here, Edhai tells a funny story about a man on his death-bed.

Al Bidiya Mosque

2008-05-23T09:37:00.003+04:00

My students, Ahmed and Edhai, made this movie about their home town of Al Bidiya, near Khorfakkan in the UAE.

Images of the United Arab Emirates

2008-05-22T20:11:00.003+04:00

The Emeratis are a generous, warm-hearted and good-humored people.

Ras Al Khaimah

2008-05-22T19:56:00.003+04:00

I keep my small yacht, Elsie Brown, in the Ras Al Khaimah Sailing Club. Here is a video of this emirate.

View Larger Map

How to get to #1

2008-05-22T00:50:00.006+04:00

Rotating partners is a relatively new practice on JG500. It was championed by Daffers and Lee as a way to minimise the rampant cheating that has plagued the site over the years.

Members of the Vitriolic Hall of Fame argued hard against it but lost out to the membership who had grown weary of their cheating. I certainly miss the days when I played mostly with my preferred partners - I was able to get much better games more often on the site - but, I don't miss the cheating.

Here are some excerpts from my posts in last year's expired 500 Boys forum thread.

How to get to and stay #1 the hard way:

Challenge top players to rotating foursomes and win more than you lose.
Don't use MSN or any other form of private communication with your partners during the games.

How to get to and stay #1 the easy way:

Find a "preferred partner" who will communicate with you during a game using MSN or some other form of private communications and cheat like hell.
Try not to MSN the other members in the game by mistake but if you do lie like hell.
Refuse to rotate partners or find a believable excuse not to do so. If challenged lie like hell and tell everyone you have always rotated - even before it became common practice.
Find a friend who doesn't care about elo to throw games to you in a locked room. If challenged - lie like hell.
If you can't get a friend to do this then buy another membership or two. These can be used to bolster your elo and to reduce the elo of your rivals. Use the second account to win games off your rivals and then logon in a locked room with both your accounts and quickly forfeit several games to yourself. I call it the "runtaj" maneuver after the two silly members who perfected it. Oh, and of course, lie like hell when discovered by telling everyone it was for a member of your family or a tactic to get Richard to improve the elo system. Hehe, most of the membership will believe you - try it!
Disappear every time you are #1 and only reappear to practice steps 1-4above until you are #1 again. If challenged lie like hell and tell them your PC isn'tworking or some other lie that explains why you can't play a lot.
Find a third cheat and really have fun playing bent rotating foursomes -some say three players vs one is better than sex or chocolate. Its like picking on the new nerd in school. There are several cheats who are happy to throwgames for you whilst partnering your opponents - that's how they get theirkicks. Newer members are particularly juicy and they never suspect what isgoing on. More experienced members find it easy to spot so be careful. Ifcaught, guess what? Lie like farkin hell!
If you need to lose a game to regain #1 because you haven't lost for a few days pop in for one game with a good player and lose only one game. Then lie like hell about having to go somewhere else and get the hell out of there! Good honest players are dangerous and should be avoided at all costs unless your"preferred partner" or second account is at hand.
Whenever someone mentions the "C" word in the forum immediately post that you have never cheated; that there is no more cheating on the site anymore; and, that you have heard that there used be be some cheating before but you have no idea who it was. Accusing them of cheating is also a good move.

Since the majority of the club has started rotating partners every time they play there has been a succession of worthy number ones at the top of the ladder. The top spot has changed hands many times as each champ has vigorously defended their gong by readily partnering all comers. It has also been a great time for new members who have had a much better chance of partnering more experienced players.

Those few champs of late who haven't regularly and consistently rotated their partners, who suddenly disappear as soon as they win their gong only to reappear with their "preferred partner" when they lose it, are sticking out like sore thumbs and are looking decidedly sad and silly.

The culture of "preferred partners", with the associated possibility of cheating, is dead. Long live rotation.

Rabbit Season!!!

2008-05-20T22:54:00.002+04:00

The Prediction

2008-05-20T22:51:00.001+04:00

Cyberbullying on the Internet

2008-05-20T22:39:00.001+04:00

From http://www.bullyoffline.org/related/cyber.htm

Cyber bullies, cyber bullying, flame mail, hate mail

The Internet provides the perfect forum for cyberbullies, individuals whose aim is to gain gratification from the distress caused by provoking and tormenting others. The anonymity, ease of provocation, and almost infinite source of targets means the Internet is full of predators from pedophiles targeting children to serial bullies targeting ... anybody.

Cyberbullies get a perverse sense of satisfaction (called gratification) from sending people flame mail and hate mail. Flame mail is an email whose contents are designed to inflame and enrage. Hate mail is hatred (including prejudice, racism, sexism etc) in an email.

Serial bullies, whose behaviour profile you'll find in full at Bully OnLine, harbour a lot of internal aggression which they direct at others. This may include projection, false criticism and patronising sarcasm whilst contributing nothing of any value. It may also include a common tactic of "a number of people have emailed me backchannel to agree with me". This is standard bully-speak which I've experienced on several forums. In every case it's a fabrication or a distortion - usually the former. It's also a variant of the serial bully head teacher who says "a number of parents have complained to me about you...". When challenged, the identity of the alleged complainants can't be disclosed because it's "confidential". The purpose of this tactic is to wind people up. Don't be fooled into believing it has any validity - it doesn't.

People who bully are adept at creating conflict between those who would otherwise pool negative information about them. The method of creating conflict is provocation which bullies delight in because they know they can always coerce at least one person to respond in a manner which can then be distorted and used to further flame and inflame people. And so it goes on. The bully then sits back and gains gratification from seeing others engage in destructive behaviour towards each other.

Many serial bullies are also serial attention-seekers. More than anything else they want attention. It doesn't matter what type of attention they get, positive or negative, as long as they can provoke someone into paying them attention. It's like a 2-year-old child throwing a tantrum to get attention from a parent. The best way to treat bullies is to refuse to respond and to refuse to engage them - which they really hate. In other words, do not reply to their postings, and on forums carry on posting without reference to their postings as if they didn't exist. In other words, treat nobodies as nobodies.

The anger of a serial bully is especially apparent when they come across someone who can see through them to espy the weak, inadequate, immature, dysfunctional aggressive individual behind the mask. For instance, when serial bullies see themselves described at workbully/serial.htm they usually send me an abusive email.

If you receive abusive emails or flame mails or hate mail, you can forward it to abuse@isp where "isp" is the service provider the abuser is using, eg "aol.com" or "yahoo.com". Although Internet service providers may not act on every complaint, the more complaints they receive about a particular individual (with examples of abusive email) the more likely they are to close down the person's account.

The objectives of bullies are Power, Control, Domination, Subjugation. They get a kick out of seeing you react. It doesn't matter how you react, the fact they've successful provoked a reaction is, to the bully, a sign that their attempt at control have been successful. After that, it's a question of wearing you down. The more your try to explain, negotiate, conciliate, etc the more gratification they obtain from your increasingly desperate attempts to communicate with them. Understand that it is not possible to communicate in a mature adult manner with a disordered individual who's emotionally retarded.

The Number One rule for dealing with this type of behaviour is: don't respond, don't interact and don't engage. This is not as easy to do as it sounds. It's a natural response to want to defend yourself, and to put the person right. However, never argue with a serial bully; it's not a mature adult discussion, but like dealing with a child or immature teenager; whilst the serial bully may be an adult on the outside, on the inside they are like a child who's never grown up - and probably never will. Serial bullies and harassers often have disordered thinking patterns and do not share the same thoughts or values as you.

The second rule is to keep all abusive emails. Create a new folder, perhaps called "Abuse", and move hate mail and flame mail into this folder. You don't have to read it. When the time comes to take action, this folder of hate mail and flame mail is your evidence. Bullies, especially cyberbullies, are obsessive people and if their account is closed down you may start receiving mail from another address. This can later be compared to the abusive emails you've already received to identify the perpetrator. You'll find the same words, phrases and strategies occurring.

The third rule is to understand bullying. Read through Bully OnLine carefully, understand the profile of the serial bully. Recognise that you are not dealing with a person who has the same mindset as yourself. Bullying, and especially cyberbullying, has links with stalking - see related/stalking.htm for links to stalking sites.

Rule four is get help. If you're a young person, this is essential. Even mature experienced adults often cannot handle bullying and harassment by themselves. Sometimes you are dealing with a severely disordered and dangerous individual.

Rule five is become alert to provocation. It could be called "The Baiting Game". A provocative comment is made and those who respond spontaneously in irritation (eg non-assertively) are then encouraged to engage in conflict with those who respond without irritation (eg assertively). The provoker watches, waits and stirs the pot with the occasional additional provocation. What interests me is the sense of gratification that a provoker gains from watching others indulge in destructive interaction initiated by him- or herself. In this context, gratification is a perverse form of satisfaction akin to, but distinct from, pleasure.

The sixth rule is become an observer. Although you may be the target of the cyberbully's anger, you can train yourself to act as an observer. This takes you out of the firing line and enables you to study the perpetrator and collect evidence. When people use bullying behaviours they project their own weaknesses, failings and shortcomings on to others. In other words, they are telling you about themselves by fabricating an accusation based on something they themselves have done wrong. Whenever you receive a flame mail or hate mail, train yourself to instinctively ask the question, "What is this person revealing about themselves this time?"

The seventh rule is decide if you want to take action, and if so, prepare carefully and strike hard. Sometimes refusing to respond and engage will result in the cyberbully losing interest and going off to find someone easier to torment. Sometimes though, especially if there has been interaction in the past, the cyberbully is so obsessed that s/he cannot and will not let go. You will have to make that person let go, but only through swift, hard, legal action, and only when the time is right. Don't deal with the abuser yourself (this encourages bullies and stalkers), use a third party such as a solicitor.

Finally a reminder - never try to mediate, negotiate, conciliate or otherwise deal with a bully or stalker yourself. Always remember Rule #1: don't respond, don't interact and don't engage.

My page on stalking which includes a behaviour profile of the Internet stalker may prove interesting.

Bully OnLine is a gold mine of insight and information on bullying which identifies the different types of harassment and bullying, and exposes the principal perpetrator, the serial bully. Everyone, whether they're receiving flame mails or hate mail or not, knows at least one person in their life with the profile of the serial bully. Click here to see ...who does this describe in your life?

Have a look through this web site to recognise the bullies and bullying in your life ... start with Am I being bullied? then move on to What is bullying? To find out what you can do about bullying, click Action to tackle bullying. Have a look at the profile of the serial bully which is common to sociopathic managers, harassers, stalkers, rapists, violent partners, abusers, paedophiles, even serial killers of the organised kind.

If bullying and harassment have caused injury to health, commonly diagnosed as "stress", see the page on injury to health and the one on the psychiatric injury of trauma, a collection of symptoms congruent with the diagnostic criteria for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD.

Links

May 2005: One in five young people bullied by mobile phone or via the internet [More]

March 2005: Study reveals 40 percent of students claim to have been bullied online [More]

Staying safe in cyberspace, a page from Bullying Online at www.bullying.co.uk

Cyberbullying - practical advice for parents and schools

Conflict in Cyberspace: how to resolve conflict online by Kali Munro

The Psychology of Cyberspace by John Suler

http://www.haltabuse.org/

http://www.wiredpatrol.org/

Links to cyberbullying and Internet violence sites

Links to stalking sites

26 August 2004: article in New York Times, Internet Gives Teenage Bullies Weapons to Wound From Afar

Dante's Inferno Test - Impurity, Sin... and Damnation

2008-05-20T22:34:00.002+04:00

Welcome to the Dante's Inferno Hell Test. This test, sponsored by the 4degreez.com community (the fine people who brought you the famous Personality Disorder Test), is based on the description of Hell found in Dante's Divine Comedy. Answer the questions below as honestly as you can and discover your fate. Based on your answers, your purity will be judged and you will be banished to the appropriate level of hell. Abandon all hope.

My Results:

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very High
Level 7 (Violent)	Moderate
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

Do You Have a Personality Disorder?

2008-05-20T21:57:00.005+04:00

First, what is a personality disorder?

A personality disorder is basically a set of traits that combine to negatively affect your life. They have a wide range of causes and some are easier to treat than others. This test is set up to look for the ten recongized personality disorders which are Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal, Antisocial, Borderline, Histrionic, Narcissistic, Avoidant, Dependent, and Obsessive-Compulsive.

This test, sponsored by 4degreez.com, is meant to help determine whether or not you have a personality disorder. It is not meant to be used as a diagnostic tool, but rather as a tool to give you insight into a potential disorder that may be having a negative impact on your life. If you believe you may be suffering from a personality disorder or any other disorder, you should ask your family doctor to recommend a therapist in your area to meet with.

My Results:

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Low
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	High
Narcissistic:	High
Avoidant:	Low
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Information --

If you are looking for a personality test that features a professional analysis of your results, try Tickle.com's test.

My Results:

Daffy, you're a Skydiver!

You're open minded, extroverted, free-spirited, and independent. Chances are you're pretty liberal. You're like a magnet for love and affection. People adore you. And, thanks to that healthy dose of self-confidence, you're super-flexible.

Chances are, you're a great leader at work. You're also a self-starter and will always volunteer to take on a job. You're also an excellent communicator and tend to spread your enthusiasm to others.

The Psychology of Cyberspace by John Suler, Ph.D

2008-05-19T19:23:00.005+04:00

This hypertext book explores the psychological aspects of environments created by computers and online networks. It presents an evolving conceptual framework for understanding how people react to and behave within cyberspace: what I call "the psychology of cyberspace" - or simply "cyberpsychology." Continually being revised and expanded, this hypertext book originally was created in January of 1996.

The Psychology of Cyberspace Blog Companion: As a companion reader to this online book, I use my blog to give readers an inside view of a cyberpsychologist's life and the day-to-day issues we deal with. What is it like to study how people behave online? What issues are my colleagues and the media talking about?

Chapters Include:

Conflict in Cyberspace: How to Resolve Conflict Online

Have you ever noticed how conflict can get blown out of proportion online? What may begin as a small difference of opinion, or misunderstanding, becomes a major issue very quickly. Conflict can be difficult at the best of times, but what is it about online communication that seems to ignite ?flaming? and make conflicts more difficult to resolve?

The Bad Boys of Cyberspace: Deviant Behavior in Online Multimedia Communities and Strategies for Managing it

SNERT... That's what they call the real trouble-makers of cyberspace. Attributed by some to Kurt Vonnegut, the term stands for "snot-nosed Eros-ridden teenager." It concisely captures much of what many cyberspace deviants are all about. They thumb their impudent noses at authority figures and smear their ooze of discontent all over themselves and others. Frustrated drives seeking an outlet may fuel their misconduct - frustrated aggressive drives as well as sexual ones. They often are adolescents. If they aren't, then they are regressed adults acting like adolescents. In some communities, the term "snert" broadens to include any acting out, annoying, disruptive user.

How Does Online Gaming Affect Social Interactions?

2008-05-19T19:11:00.005+04:00

ScienceDaily (Sep. 20, 2007) — Online multiplayer communities are social networks built around multiplayer online computer games. Members of these communities typically share an interest in online gaming and a great deal of the interaction between them is technologically mediated. Marko Siitonen from University of Jyväskylä studied social interaction in online multiplayer communities in his doctoral thesis of speech communication.

Online multiplayer gaming is a playground which can give us clues about the future of social and technological developments, Siitonen states.

Online multiplayer games enable the formation of lasting relationships

Online multiplayer games typically encourage interaction between players: some go even as far as demanding it. Collaboration with other players may be a prerequisite for making progress in a game, or a game may be based on competition between players.

Typical online games can be played fairly independently, without seeking closer contact with other gamers. However, social interaction is a strong motive not only for playing multiplayer games, but also for forming lasting social relationships with other gamers, Siitonen says.

Online games are based on the possibilities of computer networks. This shows in the scope of modes of communication that typical multiplayer games offer. A single game can support communication based on text, image, and sound. In addition, a game may provide tools for interaction between two people, as well as enable communication between whole groups and communities.

In addition to using the modes of communication offered by games, members of multiplayer communities may keep in touch face to face, over the phone, via email, or in IRC, Siitonen explains.

Long-term interaction lays the foundation for a feeling of community

Social interaction between members of multiplayer communities shares similarities to interaction in face-to-face groups. Shared values and goals are the basis on which a shared understanding and a sense of community are built on.

Negotiating values and goals is an ongoing process that takes place throughout the existence of a community. They are reflected e.g. by how new members are accepted in the community and by how the roles that are significant to the operation of the community are cast. Disagreement concerning these issues may lead to conflicts within communities, yet solving these conflicts can serve the purpose of strengthening or changing the community’s foundations.

The traditional building blocks of identity, such as appearance or age, are often insignificant in multiplayer gaming communities. A 13-year-old French schoolgirl, a 27-year-old Swedish housewife, and a 44-year-old American engineer can all be members of the same community. When the members never meet face to face, they form perceptions of each other based on e.g. how active or reliable they think the others are, Siitonen describes.

Forming images of the other members can be quick in a technologically mediated environment. Still, reputation based on long-term social interaction does have real significance in online multiplayer communities. Activity and motivation are emphasized in technologically mediated communication, and the most active members often hold the leading positions in the communities.

Online multiplayer communities are susceptible to changes. Old communities perish and new ones are born constantly, and gamers frequently shift between communities. However, the social networks and personal relationships that form the base of these communities may survive even though the disbandment of a community. It is possible that a new multiplayer community rises out of the old one’s ashes.

Siitonen used interviews and information gathered by participant observation as the data for his study. The observation data was collected from two different communities within an online multiplayer game called Anarchy Online.

Colour Changing Card Trick

2008-05-19T19:00:00.001+04:00

Game Room Code of Conduct

2008-05-18T20:58:00.004+04:00

The JG500 club needs a Game Room Code of Conduct. Here is a suggested code based on The International Online Bridge Club.

Ethical 500 Card Playing:
adapted from The International Online Bridge Club
www.bridgeclublive.com

Code of Conduct

I will be polite, friendly and courteous at all times – whether chatting or contributing to the Forum.
I will respect other members' rights to have different opinions or ways of thinking.
I will conduct my chat in a proper, mature and inoffensive manner taking into account that the internet environment is without feelings and deprives us of the real voices and smiles that take the ‘sting’ out of face to face chat.
I will assist new members and guests and try to show patience and understanding.
I will ALWAYS make sure that a "HAND" is completed. What this means is that I will not leave any table without first being sure that the score has been registered.

The ‘Dos’ and ‘Do nots’
The DO'S:

DO announce your bidding system and any additional conventions BEFORE you start play. Make sure you know what system your partnership is playing before starting play.
DO wait for a player who has disconnected from your table – whether an opponent or partner. Despite modern technology, the internet can still cause bad connections. If you are disconnected or your computer froze, or some other emergency, DO send an email or Forum note of apology to the other 3 players explaining the situation.
DO Kibitz - but quietly please. We all love to watch others, but when kibitzing, please don’t dominate the chat during the bidding or the play.
Misbids and Misclicks DO happen. If you misbid or misclick, it is better to say nothing at the time and then, at the end of the hand explain what happened.
DO enjoy the game. But be thoughtful of the other players.
If you open another account DO inform the membership that you are playing with more than one account.

The DO NOT'S:

DO NOT ever leave the table before finishing a hand.
DO NOT deliberately lose a game to another member.
DO NOT discuss the bidding or the hand during the play of the hand. This is called “Table Talk”. This includes text references such as “WTF!!” and “Hmm” as well as smilies such as or .
DO NOT swear or use abusive language anywhere in our club – it is a friendly place. Please do your part to maintain this atmosphere.
DO NOT criticise or gloat at your opponents’ expense.
DO NOT take excessive time to play a card or to play the next hand. It is absolutely correct to take some time to think during a hand but try to keep the game moving at a comfortable pace. If the phone or doorbell rings or if you have a minor emergency - type 'brb' (be right back) BEFORE you leave to deal with the interruption. Be as fast as you can. Also when a hand is finished, some post-mortem analysis is reasonable, but not too long and certainly not spilling over into the next hand.
DO NOT forget your table manners when sitting down or leaving a table. Say hello or welcome when you join, and goodbye/thank you before you leave. Otherwise you will be thought of as a rude and unsociable person.
Other than using the game's chat to hold a post-mortem after a hand DO NOT discuss an ongoing game with your partner outside the game environment (eg MSN, phone, Skype etc).

Enough with the table talking already!

Flippa's Charter of Cheat's Rights

2008-05-17T21:27:00.010+04:00

This is my favourite Lee post, a response to Flippa's defence of online cheating at JG500, a defence used many times over the years by members and affiliates of the Vitriolic Hall of Fame.

Sadly, thanks to Richard's ongoing attempts to hide the site's cheating history, this thread expired along with the rest of the club's history. This extract is from the Cheating thread from 2007 and is available in the blog's Public Folder.

FLIPPA’S CHARTER OF CHEAT’S RIGHTS

1. Cheats shall be at absolute liberty to practise wide ranging public deception. In particular:

1.1 Cheats shall be entitled to prey upon any and all members of this club, particularly newer members, at their absolute and wide ranging discretion.

1.2 Cheats shall be entitled to receive accolades in this public forum when the fruits of their deception are realised, and publicly acknowledge what skilful players they are.

2. Cheats shall also be entitled to:

2.1 Absolute privacy. Despite a cheat’s absolute right to practisie wide ranging public deception, no member shall be permitted to confront a cheat publicly (in like manner) by using this forum.

3. Cheats who are confronted with allegations of cheating and who subsequently admit that they have in fact been cheating shall be entitled to:

3.1 A complete re-write of history. Despite their own admission of cheating, cheats shall be entitled to have this damning admission ignored and the evidence they were confronted with pejoratively described as “so-called evidence” and “trumped up evidence".

4. Upon being established as a cheat, cheats shall be entitled to divest themselves of any responsibility and consequences for their actions. In particular:

4.1 The impact on the cheat as a consequence of being caught is the sole and paramount consideration. Cheats have a right to empathy and sympathy despite being the author of their own misfortune. The impact on other members who have been victims of the cheats deception shall be absolutely disregarded.

FLIPPA’S CHARTER OF HONEST MEMBER’S RIGHTS

1. Honest members have no right to publicly campaign for fair and honest play.

2. Honest members shall not publicly complain when they have been the victim of cheating, despite a cheat’s complete liberty to practise public deception.

3.Honest members shall completely disregard their own feelings of having been played for a mug and respect a cheat’s right to privacy and empathy.

4.Honest members must tolerate the existence of cheats in this club. An honest member’s only right in this regard is the generous privilege of avoiding playing the cheat.

5. Honest members have no right to be concerned that the tolerance of cheating may lead to the widespread breakdown of honest, fair play in this club. Any honest member breaching this rule shall be deemed to be a crank and “site policeman”.

Sailing of Kalba near the Omani border

2008-05-17T21:11:00.006+04:00

After these photos were taken the winds increased to 30 knots
and both yachts suffered rigging damage trying to get back into harbor.

This is my speed boat, a typical local fishing boat
and a gift from a generous student.

Fujairah - home in the United Arab Emirates

2008-05-17T21:08:00.003+04:00

View Larger Map

Daffy at the Movies

2008-05-17T16:19:00.004+04:00

Yanky-Doodle Daffy

Stuperduck

500 Soapbox

2008-05-17T15:44:00.008+04:00

Got something you want to say? Click on the "Post a Comment" link at the bottom of the main post and feel free to comment here on any topic at all - 500 or otherwise. In the same way feel free to comment on any posts in this blog.

Originally posted by BunY and far too good to expire

2008-05-17T15:16:00.003+04:00

The questions below about Australia are from potential visitors. They were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour.

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks (Sweden)?
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not ... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is ... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay night clubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.

Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Grumma's Lag Report

2008-05-17T14:35:00.002+04:00

I have placed Grumma's Lag Report into the Public Folder:

Craig's Picture Shows

2008-05-17T14:16:00.009+04:00

Unforced Miseres Must be Won

2008-05-17T12:43:00.010+04:00

What is it about misere that is so appealing? Is it because winning misere is akin to legal cheating? Or is it because those who can't fight misere think others can't as well?

When bidding a risky misere bear in mind that a loss is a sizable negative 250 - half the way to the backdoor on the first hand of a game! Avoid negative scores at all cost early in the game. Once there good players wi;; push and bluff you further towards the back door.

You can usually spot new players by the number of unforced miseres they lose. And you can spot experienced players by the number of poor miseres they take down.

Poor players usually assist their opponents to get their misere bids in by calling 7 when a pass would cut their losses by at least 130 points. It's also a good rule of thumb not to push your opponents to open unless you have a good chance of beating them. See "Make Friends With the PASS Button" in my 500 Top 10.

The Major Cause of Lag at JG500

2008-05-17T10:06:00.006+04:00

In the middle of a lagging game with Gus six months ago I formed a hypothesis that most lag was the result of client-side problems rather than a server-side problem. I tested the hypothesis rigorously and sure enough most of my lag problems were client-side.

It appears that any interruption of the connection to the 500 server creates a client-side lag. I have done this in 3 different but related ways now:

Hibernation of laptop while web-server with 500 site is running
Disconnection of the ethernet lead during a game and wait for wireless reconnection
Running screen-saver for a few minutes while web-server with 500 site is running

Most instances of these lags were fixed by restarting the web-browser. However some could only be fixed by rebooting the laptop completely.

Here is a summary of the steps I am taking to avoid client-side lags:

If your laptop or PC enters sleep/hibernation mode then close down your web-browser and restart it before playing 500. If your game is lagging then reboot your machine.
If your laptop or PC's screen-saver starts then close down your web-browser and restart it before playing 500. If your game is lagging then reboot your machine. Reset your screen saver to over 10 minutes.
If you experience a break in connection to the 500 game by either an interruption to your Ethernet or wireless connection close down your web-browser and restart it before playing 500. If your game is lagging then reboot your machine. Reset your screen saver to over 10 minutes.

These solutions have worked for many others. The message is - if you have got lag then turn off your sleep mode and close down and restart your web browser.

Toby at play

2008-05-16T20:30:00.003+04:00

Expired JG500 Forum Threads

2008-05-16T11:18:00.003+04:00

In a misguided attempt to stifle discussion about cheating, inactive threads on the JG500 Forum expire after two months. This has had the opposite effect of encouraging cheating as the offenders know their records are wiped clean every few months. Benno the Cheat has used his official "pardon" several times since he first used Toby's account to award himself a JG500 gong two years ago. Many other cheats are still happily beating unsuspecting newer members safe in the knowledge that JG500 has no official site history anymore.

However, some of the more interesting expired threads, saved as PDF documents, can be read in this public folder:

It's time to step-up and moderate or quit!

2008-05-15T23:03:00.023+04:00

Two weeks ago Anders announced the trial of a moderated JG500 Forum with a Forum Code of Conduct. At the same time a new thread was started that immediately breached the new code. Over the course of a week several other members contributed more posts that breached the new code. It was a perfect opportunity for the forum moderators to quietly step-in and ask the offensive posters to self-moderate. This did not happen and the thread has snowballed into yet another JG500 soap opera.

Anders hard at work moderating the JG500 Forum

I have been a JG500 member since February 2005. Throughout these years the site has had a forum focused on abuse and ridicule resulting in most members being too intimidated to contribute other than the occasional WD #1. For my sins I have been an active participant in the ridicule whilst campaigning against the abuse.

Three years ago I suggested to the JG500 administrator that the site needed a a moderated forum and code of conduct that covered both game play and the forum. This suggestion was ignored by the administrator and most of the membership and ridiculed by others. Four months ago I created Let's Talk 500, a moderated forum designed to demonstrate the features and advantages that a moderated forum could offer JG500. At the same time, and independently, Anders canvassed the membership on their thoughts about the need for a moderated forum.

My forum thread about LT500 can be read here. Anders two threads about forum moderation can be read here and here.

A member asked me this week why I thought the JG500 site does not have more active members after more than five years of existence. I replied that it stemmed from an abusive and nasty forum culture coupled with a bad lag that never goes away.

Moderators, it's time to step-up and moderate or quit and give someone who knows how to fairly enforce a code of conduct the opportunity to do the job better. The JG500 forum culture won't heal itself!

Welcome to the Julianne Giffin Forum

2008-05-15T22:57:00.008+04:00

The aim of this forum is to disable positive, supportive, healthy debate and interaction. This is best achieved by publicly sharing any and all personal problems in the forum rather than by directly contacting individual members and settling matters privately. A fun experience for everyone can be ensured by freely adding comment on matters of which you have no direct knowledge. Ensure an unfriendly atmosphere for forum members by launching unprovoked personal attacks on self opinionated high and mighty ignoramuses, arrogant numskulls and so so players who come onto the website to relax and play. Personal attacks, offensive content, utter bullshit, defamatory comments and insults will be passively encouraged by poor or non-existent moderation amongst rats, ducks, foxes and other assorted morons.

juliannegiffin.com/500/code_of_conduct.jsp - sort of...

SOCIAL and COMPETITION games - suggested improvement

2008-05-15T01:24:00.002+04:00

One improvement I have been thinking about is having the option for members to play either SOCIAL or COMPETITION games, Yahoo Games has this option. This option could go on the new game form that Smith/Anders are working on.

SOCIAL games would be the same as what we have now - no change.

COMPETITION games would only be for rotated members 4somes. The game server would automatically chose and rotate partnerships. If the same 4 members resumed their battle at a later date then the game server would remember and keep the rotation going. A second Competition ELO just for this type of game choice should be created.

To raise more $$$ for the club I would be happy to pay an extra $5/month to qualify for COMPETITION games.

My first games at JG500

2008-05-15T01:21:00.001+04:00

My first games at JG500 were with Rat, then named Streamline after a horse that either broke his heart or made his fortune, don't know which. Rat must have beaten me about 50/2 that first day in two-handers. I had no idea what he was doing but, as someone who thought himself to be a fairly good 500 player, I knew I had found a place to improve my game and have some fun. Since then, I have enjoyed 1000s of games with him. He has always been willing to play all comers and rotate as often as they want. A great player, a good sport and a good bloke too - but don't tell him I said so. Shame about his B.O. though!

Within the first week I ran up across Dave, one of the site's finest players and another great guy. It was Dave who has probably taught me more about the finer points of 500 than any other. Two of Dave's lessons immediately spring to mind: "The best block steals your opponents bid" and "When your partner starts an NT run near the end of the game - sacrifice your higher cards of that suit so s/he can keep the lead and win the tricks".

In those early days there were many lovely folk who have drifted away but we spend many hours winning and loosing and taking the #$%^ out of each other. Patty Ducati, Boo, Guy and the rest of you - happy new year and I hope to play with you again sometime soon.

Moving to more recent times I have thoroughly enjoyed playing with and against Paddy (Pat), especially in those fierce two-handed battles when all the other members are either sleeping, working or walking (Hi Nancy). What would we do without each other and this site, darls? You have come a long way since you bid your first open misere and immediately led the Jack of Diamonds - LOLOLOL - do you remember?

It was brilliant last year to catch up and play face-to-face with Badger - one of nature's gentlemen. When Roy first started playing here he thought a 6 bid was daring, a 7 bid was almost impossible to get, and we all popped the champaign corks the night he finally bid 8! That night I also met Trinity, still the finest 500 player I have ever played, and Noff, another champ, who kindly hosted the night. I look forward to many more such nights when Linh and I finally return to Australia.

Top Partners

2008-05-15T01:17:00.011+04:00

Adam4
Angie
Craig
Dave (Gus)
Lee
Rat
SSD
Thomo
Toby
Trinity
Wayne

Categories of Cheating

2008-05-15T00:57:00.004+04:00

Collusion: Using MSN and other secret communication systems to table talk with other game players during play

Second Accounts: Buying another club account and using it to secretly to increase the rating of your main account.

ELO Transfer: Using another account to throw games to your main account.

Table Talk: Chatting during a game about the hand in play.

Table Talk: rude at best and cheating at worst

2008-05-15T00:52:00.005+04:00

My favorite table talk (TT) from JG500 last week:

Daffy: PASS (sitting on 3 uncalled aces)
Member's Partner: Someone is lying
Member: Daff
Daffy: No TT pls
Member's Partner: Sorry
Member: That wasn't TT. I never TT! Don't you accuse...blah blah blah....

This particular member was asked to stay away from my rooms after 2 more episodes of this kind of table talk over the next two days. Interestingly, on most occasions his partners were complaining as much as I was.

Fortunately there are still many grown-ups on JG500 who continue to enjoy honest competitive play. Our room code of conduct is simple - no table talk at all about the hand in play, either in the room's chat window, or on MSN, or on the phone. We define table talk as ANY comments or discussion about the hand in play. Comments such as "Sorry p", "Arggggg" and "Umm" are just as much table talk as "I wanted misere". We also enjoy critiquing hands after they have finished. These post-mortems require robust egos and are often as interesting as the hands themselves. Members with frail self-esteem should think twice before playing with us. Whinging about losing is also considered poor form.

Table talking is RUDE at best and CHEATING at worst. I know many who don't agree, and I appreciate their staying away from my rooms. This site is big enough to avoid members you don't enjoy playing with.

My 500 Top 10

2008-05-15T00:06:00.020+04:00

I play best with partners who use the same conventions that I use. Although the conventions below apply in most situations they won't apply to all. Remember, most hands are won or lost in the bidding round. Good partnerships win more games by working well together in the bidding round. Feel free to comment:

The Score dictates the bidding. Always look at the scoreline before starting your bidding. Always!! For example, if you are near the back door it is often best to call strength at 6. Also, if you don't wish to fight a game-winning misere or open it is usually prudent to undercall or pass and live to win another hand. Partners who know when to "close-down" the bidding are worth their weight in gold.
Call your aces and bird at 6 - sometimes call aces before the bird. Let your partner know your no-trumps strength but calling your off-suit aces at 6. This will provide your partnership with a strong foundation for successful 8 bids. If the scoreline tells you that the bidding will go high then call your bird after your ace so that you can get a feel of the table's strength. As long as your partner is still in the bidding your bird call at six must be honest. However, if your partner has passed, you can then use a six no-trumps call to set-up your misere call or block your opponents.
Call your strength at 7. There are times to pass and times to bid - the scoreline tells you what time it is. Too many partners pass when the partnership's back is to the wall. A good partner will call their meagre strength at 7 so the team can put up a fighting defense. If you don't have any aces but have a strong hand then call your strength straight up at 7. Going straight to 7 tells your partner your strength but that you have no aces.
Avoid using misere / open codes. Using 7 spades straight-up to signal your wish for misere or 9 spades to signal your wish for open may work well against inexperienced players but a good opposition will use these calls against you. If you can't beat an open and your opponent has called 9 spades straight up then don't pass but call open yourself before the opposition does or call your strength to your partner. Of course watch out - top players will try and bluff you into overcalling with a 9 spade push.
Call into your partner's hand. Try to understand and use your partner's calls. Think of your two hands as one. If you have bird and your partners change your strength from hearts to diamonds (for example) consider passing into their strength or upping their call. Then lead to their bauer before playing your bird.
Leave your partner on an ace call if necessary. In general it is best not to leave your partners on their ace calls as they do not indicate their strength. However, there are times, such as when you cannot defend against a game-winning misere call or when the ace call represents your weak strength, that it is prudent to leave your partners on their 6 calls.
Avoid negative scores especially on the first hand. Being underwater places your team in a very vulnerable position. A good opposition will exploit your negative posture with aggressive pushes and bluffs. It's often better to allow the opposition to win a small 7 bid than risk a negative score.
Block whenever necessary. You are always only two good calls from victory so stop your opponents from easy wins by utilising blocking calls. The best block often steals your opponents call.
Make friends with the PASS button. Compulsive bidding is a disease - cure it! You will win as many games letting your opponents back door themselves as you will by bidding yourself through the front door. Compulsive bidders more often than not feed their opponents the misere or open calls they have been angling for.
Every bid should convey some information. Avoid guesses and hunch calls. Try always to tell your partner something every time you bid. If you know your partner will be forced to call open then call your low cards at 9, if you know your partner will be forced to a difficult 9 or 10 call then call your aces (or even your kings) at 8 and 9.

When I started playing at Julianne Giffin I just called the strength in my hand immediately at 6 and tried to get to misere and open whenever possible. I was a classic misere junkie and for well over a year I yo-yoed up and down the rankings and my win/loss percentage was in the low to middle 40s.

After a while I started to realise that most of the top players were calling differently. They represented only a small percentage of the members but they were always to be found in the top ten or twenty. They were using a variation on the system published by Bryce Francis. They called their aces at 6 and then their strength at 7. They used a 7 spades bid to indicate either their wish for misere or to indicate that they had no particular strength.

I started using this system and my game immediately improved. When I first achieved #1, with my tongue in my cheek I published “The Lord Daff’s 10 Commandments” on the forum and refused to partner players unless they used the system. Within two months most of the membership was following my stolen commandments and the top ranks became much more competitive.

I kept using this system for about year but gradually became dissatisfied with it for several reasons. The main problem was the confusion trying to understand what a 7 spade call actually meant. Did it mean “I want misere, partner, or “I’m just calling you of your 6 call, partner,” or did it actually mean “My strength is spades, partner.” I got tired of typing, “Sorry, partner, I wanted misere!” Too many contracts were going south because of this confusion.

In the past eighteen months my personal calling conventions have evolved from this system to what Gus calls, “Call your hand, partner.” It’s still evolving, but my game and my rankings have improved significantly since I started using it. I am not saying this system is any better than any other – but it is the system that is working best for me.

Musandam Trip

2006-10-13T08:40:00.008+04:00

Can it get any better than this? Here I am taking it easy in the beautiful waters of Khor Habilayn in Oman's Musandam Peninsula.

Musandam more or less begins where the mountains rise from the plains of Ras al Khaimah. The beautiful Musandam Peninsula is without doubt the most dramatic of all mountainous locations in the Gulf and a difficult region to reach other than by sea. This little known and untouched area is a haven for birds and offers some stunning scenery in its fjord-like inlets.